WWYD when An Escort Stops Responding?

[Jackrabbitslim]

Has anyone made plans in advance with an escort, and suddenly found them unresponsive as you got closer to the date?

 

I set plans with an escort a few weeks ago to meet him for an hour, and I'm traveling to his city to meet him. (Visiting a friend while I'm there, so it's not the sole reason for the trip)

 

He was very responsive and polite when we set things up, and I was very excited about meeting him.

 

I sent him a message by e-mail on Saturday, but haven't gotten a response. His ad on RM has since expired, so I sent him a text last night (Tues), and no response as of Wed at 4 pm. I'm really bummed as he looks like a really great guy, and was looking forward to spending time with him.

 

I'd totally be understanding if something came up, or he got an overnight or longer request from someone else. I'd be willing to schedule around it, or pick another weekend to travel. Also, it is not lost on me that life happens and sudden emergencies and engagements pop up that you can't get out of.

 

There are other escorts in the city that I can schedule with, but I'd hate to make plans and then cancel if the original guy gets back to me. I try to value an escort's time as much as I would want my own time valued. However, I've already booked the flight, and I now can't re-schedule to another weekend.

 

Should I give up on this guy or hold out a little longer?

[nsguy45]

Has anyone made plans in advance with an escort, and suddenly found them unresponsive as you got closer to the date?

 

I set plans with an escort a few weeks ago to meet him for an hour, and I'm traveling to his city to meet him. (Visiting a friend while I'm there, so it's not the sole reason for the trip)

 

He was very responsive and polite when we set things up, and I was very excited about meeting him.

 

I sent him a message by e-mail on Saturday, but haven't gotten a response. His ad on RM has since expired, so I sent him a text last night (Tues), and no response as of Wed at 4 pm. I'm really bummed as he looks like a really great guy, and was looking forward to spending time with him.

 

I'd totally be understanding if something came up, or he got an overnight or longer request from someone else. I'd be willing to schedule around it, or pick another weekend to travel. Also, it is not lost on me that life happens and sudden emergencies and engagements pop up that you can't get out of.

 

There are other escorts in the city that I can schedule with, but I'd hate to make plans and then cancel if the original guy gets back to me. I try to value an escort's time as much as I would want my own time valued. However, I've already booked the flight, and I now can't re-schedule to another weekend.

 

Should I give up on this guy or hold out a little longer?

Why not call him at his text #?

[+ azdr0710]

In 15 years on the forum, gotta say I've never heard this happening before.

 

Text very briefly one more time before bedtime tonight, wait another 24 hours, then move on if no reply is received.

[Jackrabbitslim]

Why not call him at his text #?

 

I hadn’t thought of that, and I might give that a try.

[Jackrabbitslim]

In 15 years on the forum, gotta say I've never heard this happening before.

 

Text very briefly one more time before bedtime tonight, wait another 24 hours, then move on if no reply is received.

 

Greatly appreciate the suggestion

[Angel]

Yes. Call him. If still no response forget about him. Maybe it is for your own good not to meet him

[MikeyGMin]

Text very briefly one more time before bedtime tonight, wait another 24 hours, then move on if no reply is received.

I would also add a very non-snarky nudge along the lines of, "If I don't hear back from you shortly I will assume something has come up and make other arrangements."

[+ poolboy48220]

I'm with @azdr0710 , there seem to be a LOT of posts about this happening to people in the past couple of weeks. Is it a new phenomenon, or has it always been happening and people are just talking about it more? (Wow, talk about a parallel to the #MeToo movement...)

[LivingnLA]

Communication expectations and standards shift over time. We have been in a cultural shift for a few years now where things like "ghosting" are more common. But, who knows? Life happens. He could've been arrested. In an accident. Changed his mind about escorting. Found an exclusive sugar daddy. Won the lottery.

 

I agree with @azdr0710 and @MikeyGMin. A call will probably not be answered. Texting is your best bet. Be calm, professional, and just say you're trying to confirm an appointment and if you don't hear back, you will make other arrangements.

Edited January 25, 2018 by LivingnLA

[caliguy]

 

I'd totally be understanding if something came up, or he got an overnight or longer request from someone else. I'd be willing to schedule around it, or pick another weekend to travel. Also, it is not lost on me that life happens and sudden emergencies and engagements pop up that you can't get out of.

Maybe he just doesn't like having to check his cellphone. I too think you should call him but no more then say 6 times. That would look bad.

[OccassionalHire]

Is an escort stops responding, stop messaging. He's an escort, not your long lost son.....

[KeepItReal]

Has anyone made plans in advance with an escort, and suddenly found them unresponsive as you got closer to the date?

 

I set plans with an escort a few weeks ago to meet him for an hour, and I'm traveling to his city to meet him. (Visiting a friend while I'm there, so it's not the sole reason for the trip)

 

He was very responsive and polite when we set things up, and I was very excited about meeting him.

 

I sent him a message by e-mail on Saturday, but haven't gotten a response. His ad on RM has since expired, so I sent him a text last night (Tues), and no response as of Wed at 4 pm. I'm really bummed as he looks like a really great guy, and was looking forward to spending time with him.

 

I'd totally be understanding if something came up, or he got an overnight or longer request from someone else. I'd be willing to schedule around it, or pick another weekend to travel. Also, it is not lost on me that life happens and sudden emergencies and engagements pop up that you can't get out of.

 

There are other escorts in the city that I can schedule with, but I'd hate to make plans and then cancel if the original guy gets back to me. I try to value an escort's time as much as I would want my own time valued. However, I've already booked the flight, and I now can't re-schedule to another weekend.

 

Should I give up on this guy or hold out a little longer?

It really depends on the circumstances. I am a firm believer in Murphy. Stuff happens. So I try to be reasonable, will reach out a time or two if no response, especially if it is somebody I would consider a regular. If it is a first time meet, then I will assume the individual is a flake (no matter how much I looked forward to meeting), thank my lucky stars for figuring it out sooner, rather than later, and move on. In the circumstances you outlined, I assume it is a first time meet, so I would declare it a loss and move on. Find somebody else. I try to be respectful of other people's time - and expect the same in return. Don't let it ruin your trip! Post script - please consider submitting a review, you may save a forum member some drama!

[LaffingBear]

It's happened to me more than once.

 

And, it also happens in a significant portion of my non-rentguy activities.

 

I believe it has a lot to do with changing communication norms. The volume of information hitting humans on so many different platforms, in so many different forms..... its become acceptable to convey "not interested," "never mind," "not coming" or similar by simply ceasing to communicate. It's a form of Ghosting.

 

I hate it. I could write a rant about. But it's happening. And there's nothing to be done about it. Except, control my own reaction, recognize that the reason behind disappearing may have nothing to do with me, and the behavior of communication-cessation certainly doesn't reflect on me. So, I shrug, and move on.

 

I noticed in another thread, totally unrelated to this topic... someone wrote "you guys are so jaded!" Yeah, I am. I no longer expect civility. It takes a thicker skin to deal with some of today's communications norms.

[MikeyGMin]

The volume of information hitting humans on so many different platforms, in so many different forms....

This is why oftentimes a little persistence pays off and I would never just walk away from someone I was interested in meeting without a couple tries. A particular favorite of mine can sometimes be a little difficult to schedule because he becomes overwhelmed with the volume of communications and almost does a "reset." He accepts the fact that he's never going to get to those many, many unread communications; accepts the fact that someone in that group is probably unhappy about it; and just deals with the new influx. He's an excellent escort and I haven't talked to anyone on this board who comes away saying it wasn't worth a little extra effort to get scheduled.

 

I know I'm not in the service industry, but I do something very similar with my work email. When I get to over 500 unread emails, I go to my inbox and mark the vast majority of them as "read." I figure that many of them were fruitless and anyone who truly needed something would have sent something more recent. Not really that dissimilar to what an escort might do with all the many communications he gets that will never go anywhere.

[rvwnsd]

You should definitely text him every 15 minutes. Escorts love that.

 

But seriously...I would send a text along the lines of "Hey [name of escort] it's [your name]. Are we still on for Saturday? If I don't hear back by [insert a day/time] I'll assume you can't meet."

 

At [day/time]:01 I'd start contacting other escorts. If Escort 1 gets back to you after you have already made plans with someone else, well, he lost your business.

[Populist Fury]

I'd be like "your loss, bitch! I'll go spend my money somewhere else "

 

For real tho, clients need to start using common sense... when an escort isn't responding back, its probably because they aren't interested enough &/or have personal issues going on. Move on to another guy... problem solved.

[adventurous old guy]

There are a hundred reasons why this guy might not be responding -- the Murphy thing. I'd give it a rest for now for fear of being perceived as stalker-ish, or feeling that way myself. But I'd drop him a text next time you see his ad or up for a trip to his town, and remind him that you tried to see him before, are still interested if he is, then gauge his response. Bottom line, I'd be sticky but not stalky.

Edited January 25, 2018 by adventurous old guy

[+ Gar1eth]

Don't let it ruin your trip! Post script - please consider submitting a review, you may save a forum member some drama!

 

Unfortunately you can’t post a review of someone you’ve never met.

 

Gman

[+ nycman]

Unfortunately you can’t post a review of someone you’ve never met

True, but you can tell us who he is here.

 

I always try to search the forums before I hire.

[rvwnsd]

True, but you can tell us who he is here.

 

I always try to search the forums before I hire.

That's right. You can tell us who he is and invite members to contact you via PM for additional details, if there are any.

[Gymowner]

Do a take away. Usually works with despondent people. Text him back with "hey man I haven't heard from you so I made an appointment with another top escort in ..... That's too bad, I really chose you first. Hope all is well.

 

If he is lazy or a "mind player", that will do the trick. If something came up then he won't reply back. I think you also mentioned his ad down. So that in itself should give you enough of an answer.

[rvwnsd]

Do a take away. Usually works with despondent people. Text him back with "hey man I haven't heard from you so I made an appointment with another top escort in ..... That's too bad, I really chose you first. Hope all is well.

 

If he is lazy or a "mind player", that will do the trick. If something came up then he won't reply back. I think you also mentioned his ad down. So that in itself should give you enough of an answer.

Good one, @Gymowner.

[Jackrabbitslim]

Thanks for all the feedback.

 

Patience turned out to be worth it. He eventually got back to me, and we met up.

 

And he was absolutely incredible

[MikeyGMin]

Thanks for all the feedback.

 

Patience turned out to be worth it. He eventually got back to me, and we met up.

 

And he was absolutely incredible

Thanks for the update. It's nice to hear when something turns out positive by just being an understanding human being and cutting a guy a little slack.