Off encounter

[+ JEC]

So I met with a provider last week I saw before. Our first session was...great. We met in the morning. He was in a mood saying he’s not a morning person. His mood was off the entire session, like everything was bothering him - my beard, pinching his nipples, etc. Then during our session we had to stop 3 Times so he could, well, clean up. Then he said he could not finish and could we end “another Way”. This whole session was, well, kind of a downer. Still I paid him in full and even a small tip. Now he plans to visit my city next week and proposes to get together again. If a repeat of session 1 I would say yes. If a repeat of session 2 I would say no. But what I’m really thinking is I did not get the full experience from our last session and there should be some sort of “do over”. But there is no such thing in the offing. Discuss.....

[nsguy45]

So I met with a provider last week I saw before. Our first session was...great. We met in the morning. He was in a mood saying he’s not a morning person. His mood was off the entire session, like everything was bothering him - my beard, pinching his nipples, etc. Then during our session we had to stop 3 Times so he could, well, clean up. Then he said he could not finish and could we end “another Way”. This whole session was, well, kind of a downer. Still I paid him in full and even a small tip. Now he plans to visit my city next week and proposes to get together again. If a repeat of session 1 I would say yes. If a repeat of session 2 I would say no. But what I’m really thinking is I did not get the full experience from our last session and there should be some sort of “do over”. But there is no such thing in the offing. Discuss.....

Are the provider's initials C. D. by any chance?

[+ oldNbusted]

There is no way I would agree to another session without speaking my mind first, because otherwise my unspoken thoughts would distract me the entire time. But from your description, he's already demonstrated that your satisfaction is not his priority, so I don't imagine any good of having such a conversation. I would just move on.

 

I will say I had a less than satisfactory first meeting with a guy, with him giving me a story about his performance that he later admitted was a lie when we were discussing a second meeting. I passed on meeting again because I realized that he could have made the first meeting better during the session, but choose not to, that my satisfaction was a rather distant concern for him. It seems like he no longer advertises, I assume he just washed out of the biz. There's a lot more to it than just a lil slap n' tickle.

[+ Travis69]

I would discuss your concern with him and ask if there is a better time in the day for him. You mentioned he said he was not a morning person. That could have been the whole problem.

[MiamiLooker]

So I met with a provider last week I saw before. Our first session was...great. We met in the morning. He was in a mood saying he’s not a morning person. His mood was off the entire session, like everything was bothering him - my beard, pinching his nipples, etc. Then during our session we had to stop 3 Times so he could, well, clean up. Then he said he could not finish and could we end “another Way”. This whole session was, well, kind of a downer. Still I paid him in full and even a small tip. Now he plans to visit my city next week and proposes to get together again. If a repeat of session 1 I would say yes. If a repeat of session 2 I would say no. But what I’m really thinking is I did not get the full experience from our last session and there should be some sort of “do over”. But there is no such thing in the offing. Discuss.....

Why did you think he deserved a tip?

[nsguy45]

So I met with a provider last week I saw before. Our first session was...great. We met in the morning. He was in a mood saying he’s not a morning person. His mood was off the entire session, like everything was bothering him - my beard, pinching his nipples, etc. Then during our session we had to stop 3 Times so he could, well, clean up. Then he said he could not finish and could we end “another Way”. This whole session was, well, kind of a downer. Still I paid him in full and even a small tip. Now he plans to visit my city next week and proposes to get together again. If a repeat of session 1 I would say yes. If a repeat of session 2 I would say no. But what I’m really thinking is I did not get the full experience from our last session and there should be some sort of “do over”. But there is no such thing in the offing. Discuss.....

It sounds like your guy might have been nursing a hangover or had a rough night.

[+ JEC]

Are the provider's initials C. D. by any chance?

No, but I think I know where you are going with that....

[+ JEC]

It sounds like your guy might have been nursing a hangover or had a rough night.

I wondered this too.....either PNP (though his profile has no reference) or maybe overnight client(s)

[+ sync]

Knowing himself to not be a morning person, it was incumbent upon him to either decline the appointment or suggest the possibility of another time of day.

[nsguy45]

An escort I've seen a few times admitted to me that he once made an outcall while still feeling the ill effects from a night of heavy drinking. He tried to beg off, but the client was really pushing to meet ASAP. During their session, the escort vomited all over the client's bathroom floor, not making it to the toilet. The client became irate and ended the session immediately. The escort told me he never got dressed so fast in his life and left without charging the client for the aborted session.

[+ JEC]

left without charging the client for the aborted session.

.....which was the right thing to do

[youngboldone]

If he wasn't a morning person or in the mood, then he should have cancelled the session. That wasn't fair to you. As soon as he made that statement, I would have suggested a different time to meet and left. I can't believe you tipped him. For the rates they are charging, some of these escorts need to up their game.

[+ freecahill1965]

.....which was the right thing to do

Reasonable and forgivable since he did not try to charge. We all have bad days.

[+ JEC]

If he wasn't a morning person or in the mood, then he should have cancelled the session. That wasn't fair to you. As soon as he made that statement, I would have suggested a different time to meet and left. I can't believe you tipped him. For the rates they are charging, some of these escorts need to up their game.

I think this is my core issue. This is a business, after all...some sort of concession should have been offered IMHO in anticipation of repeat business. Maybe 2nd hour Free (everyone wins here)? I’m not a “get something free” kind of person, but am smart enough not to “fool me twice”

Edited January 12, 2018 by JEC

[nsguy45]

I think this is my core issue. This is a business, after all...some sort of concession should have been offered IMHO in anticipation of repeat business.

Speaking of concessions, how about a Senior Discount? My plumber offers one, my electrician offers one, even my barber offers one.

[+ JEC]

Speaking of concessions, how about a Senior Discount? My plumber offers one, my electrician offers one, even my barber offers one.

I think it’s a providers’ individual decision whether to discount their business. As a matter of normal business, there should be some consideration for an agreed/paid service not being provided.

[+ JEC]

There is no way I would agree to another session without speaking my mind first, because otherwise my unspoken thoughts would distract me the entire time. But from your description, he's already demonstrated that your satisfaction is not his priority, so I don't imagine any good of having such a conversation. I would just move on.

 

I will say I had a less than satisfactory first meeting with a guy, with him giving me a story about his performance that he later admitted was a lie when we were discussing a second meeting. I passed on meeting again because I realized that he could have made the first meeting better during the session, but choose not to, that my satisfaction was a rather distant concern for him. It seems like he no longer advertises, I assume he just washed out of the biz. There's a lot more to it than just a lil slap n' tickle.

Can we rename you “oldandwise?”

[+ freecahill1965]

I think it’s a providers’ individual decision whether to discount their business. As a matter of normal business, there should be some consideration for an agreed/paid service not being provided.

I think that you should mention this to the provider. I think asking for an extra 30 minutes in light of the situation is more than reasonable.

[KennF]

I think this is my core issue. This is a business, after all...some sort of concession should have been offered IMHO in anticipation of repeat business. Maybe 2nd hour Free (everyone wins here)? I’m not a “get something free” kind of person, but am smart enough not to “fool me twice”

 

Here's the thing, from my perspective. If you want to try again, and it sounds like you do, then you have to ask for some consideration for the unsatisfactory service from the second encounter.

 

If you don't ask, you will not be able to shrug it off and have a good time in the future with him. He may say yes or he may say no. That's his choice. His choice will lead you to your decision.

 

As for your tip on the second occasion, I gather that tip was about you, and not about him. You may have sent a confused message and that confused message is coming back to you now. Time to correct it.

 

Since he reached out to you, I'd suggest responding with a comment that says something like... "I appreciate the offer. I am a little hesitant because last time I felt we didn't connect and the session ended on a down note. I'd be open to considering another chance... make me an offer I can't refuse. *wink*"

 

That leaves it all in his court.

[+ freecahill1965]

Here's the thing, from my perspective. If you want to try again, and it sounds like you do, then you have to ask for some consideration for the unsatisfactory service from the second encounter.

 

If you don't ask, you will not be able to shrug it off and have a good time in the future with him. He may say yes or he may say no. That's his choice. His choice will lead you to your decision.

 

As for your tip on the second occasion, I gather that tip was about you, and not about him. You may have sent a confused message and that confused message is coming back to you now. Time to correct it.

 

Since he reached out to you, I'd suggest responding with a comment that says something like... "I appreciate the offer. I am a little hesitant because last time I felt we didn't connect and the session ended on a down note. I'd be open to considering another chance... make me an offer I can't refuse. *wink*"

 

That leaves it all in his court.

Love the advice!!!

[LaffingBear]

My advice depends on the meaning of the word great.

 

If first session was incomparable... if great = rarely found anyone providing that level of satisfaction..... then I defer to some of the advice posted above

 

If great first session means very good, but Ive experienced equal pleasure, or more...... then move on and find someone else.

 

After the second session you describe, I wouldn't return to the provider unless I felt strongly that he offers pleasure I cant hire elsewhere.

[+ nycman]

I agree...if "great"....really means "ok"....move on.

 

If 'great"....means "incredible"....I'd give it another shot.

 

I don't ask for discounts or extras regardless of poor performance....It's just my nature.

If he offers, great....if not, no problem. I make my rehire decisions based on other factors.

[dfwmassagelover]

move on, there are a lot of escorts out there, why take a chance and be disappointed?

[+ JEC]

So, to close the loop, b/c I know you're all hanging on a thread......

 

I txt'd the provider and said our last meeting was kind of a disaster, I work hard for my money, and I was hesitant about taking a risk on another meeting

His response was "yep"

 

.....and that's the end of the story.

[+ VictorPowers]

So, to close the loop, b/c I know you're all hanging on a thread......

 

I txt'd the provider and said our last meeting was kind of a disaster, I work hard for my money, and I was hesitant about taking a risk on another meeting

His response was "yep"

 

.....and that's the end of the story.

In his defense:

 

You're

Exceptionally

Pragmatic