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Argument with an escort

augustus

By + augustus
in The Deli

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quoththeraven Grand Master

+ quoththeraven

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I've never understood this attitude being expressed in this forum. I basically sell my brain to get paid. I have zero negative feelings about anyone who can make that work with their body. I've met overwhelmingly great guys doing that - there are a few bad apples, but there are in any grouping of people. We're here because we're buying what they're selling.

 

Nor does selling one's physical abilities and companionship equate to or excuse violent, non-gentlemanly behavior.

 

I too don't understand assuming that there's something wrong with escorts. That's either a projection of one's own issues or a reflection that an escort is in the wrong business.

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MrMiniver Community Regular

MrMiniver

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I've been seeing this guy for nearly 2 and a half years. Straight, good looking muscular jock in his early 20's. I see him 2-3 times a month and we often go out to the Diner afterwards. Our last meet a week ago ended in a serious argument over politics. We have debated before over this and I don't take it seriously. It was usually a good natured argument. He would always bring this stuff up. I would just disagree with him, smile or say whatever. This last meet a week ago he got furious (to the point of being menacing), snatched the money out of my hand, stormed out and slammed the door behind him. WTF?? I'm going from angry to laughing about it. Now he's texting me about when our next meet is as if nothing happened. I actually cared about this kid and would have meets when he needed the money, but he is a tough guy and gets into brawls when he goes clubbing. Right now I'm inclined to just cut him off but my heart still cares about him. Any advice guys?

 

I recounted a similar incident a couple of years ago. I had engaged an escort for a 3 day trip. From the first moment he arrived he started in on politics. I engaged a little but then realized that he was one of those people whose life revolved around a certain type of vehement political argument. So I stopped. But then he turned every inocuous thing I said about food or art or wine into something about politics. It got to the point where I started finding him completely unattractive and he stopped performing any "escort" duties. I ended up not paying him which pissed him off (too bad). The first time I didn't pay a guy. Later, I found out he was a former meth addict and was told that these kinds of obsessive behaviors are common among former meth addicts.

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  • 1 month later...
augustus Grand Master

+ augustus

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Dear All,

 

Thanks for your advice and comments. They were very helpful.

 

I especially thank the guy who PM'd me and suggested that me and the young man meet for breakfast at a diner and discuss the situation. This is what I decided to do. He swore he was just joking and that I was too sensitive. He was in serious denial. It was as if I were talking to a child all of a sudden. Seriously, I was taken aback. I tried being as patronizing as possible, but he kept insisting he was "just joking". He did apologize eventually but kept saying he was just joking and he couldn't understand what I was upset about.

 

Despite the fact that he needs the money, he couldn't bring himself to truly say I'm sorry, and also despite the fact he has told me several times I was the easiest client he has ever had and that this business has become so difficult. By just reading his face I could see he was too embarrassed to offer a sincere apology. His bravado wouldn't allow it. Even after so many meets and over 2 years. This really stunned me. I upset him once when I asked him "how's tricks" and he didn't like that but I quickly apologized. I reminded him of that and how I offered a fast regret. He wouldn't see the analogy.

 

I decided to end it and wished him the best. I am sad about this, but despite what many of you believed, I am not about to surrender control to a kid.

 

This ending occurred over 3 weeks ago, but I decided I'd let you all know the result since many of you took the time to write heartfelt responses.

 

It's not rational that I should be so distressed about this, but I am. Life does go on though.

 

My sincere thanks to all of you.

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steed8 Grand Master

steed8

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Posted
"I don't know if he's straight or not, many gay men advertise themselves that way just to get more attention because they're something we can't have unless we pay ... but many times it's been discussed in this forum the connection between straight pornstars/escorts and crime. If he has a violent nature with others, sooner or later that might come to you, he might even have a record and maybe that's why he escorts."

 

 

His record is a DUI and 3 or 4 assaults. He is actually very friendly and personable most of the time. Not a miserable person generally.

 

 

I haven't read every comment on this thread since you wrote the above lines but I had to quickly respond now that you've revealed the nature of his arrests & trouble with the law, most specifically the "assaults".

My immediate thought was a quote from an old tv show that went, "Danger, danger Will Robinson!"

Please be smart & save yourself possible harm &/or more emotional grief!

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nycman Grand Master

+ nycman

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Congratulations on trying to make it work with him and for having the balls to explain yourself face-to-face.

That couldn't have been easy. I'm very happy that you were able to see the light and move on. Grief is normal.

Embrace the sadness.....then start rebuilding yourself with your new found knowledge.

 

You are wiser than you were before and you are a better man for it.

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zeyfur Enthusiast

zeyfur

Posted
Posted
Dear All,

 

Thanks for your advice and comments. They were very helpful.

 

I especially thank the guy who PM'd me and suggested that me and the young man meet for breakfast at a diner and discuss the situation. This is what I decided to do. He swore he was just joking and that I was too sensitive. He was in serious denial. It was as if I were talking to a child all of a sudden. Seriously, I was taken aback. I tried being as patronizing as possible, but he kept insisting he was "just joking". He did apologize eventually but kept saying he was just joking and he couldn't understand what I was upset about.

 

Despite the fact that he needs the money, he couldn't bring himself to truly say I'm sorry, and also despite the fact he has told me several times I was the easiest client he has ever had and that this business has become so difficult. By just reading his face I could see he was too embarrassed to offer a sincere apology. His bravado wouldn't allow it. Even after so many meets and over 2 years. This really stunned me. I upset him once when I asked him "how's tricks" and he didn't like that but I quickly apologized. I reminded him of that and how I offered a fast regret. He wouldn't see the analogy.

 

I decided to end it and wished him the best. I am sad about this, but despite what many of you believed, I am not about to surrender control to a kid.

 

This ending occurred over 3 weeks ago, but I decided I'd let you all know the result since many of you took the time to write heartfelt responses.

 

It's not rational that I should be so distressed about this, but I am. Life does go on though.

 

My sincere thanks to all of you.

Hopefully, you will now find an escort who will give you a much better time, which is what you deserve.

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  • 1 year later...
augustus Grand Master

+ augustus

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Well, I did break it off December, 2015 for about a month and a half. He started texting me again and I responded and we got back again. Guaranteed him 3 meets a month to help him out and things were going well for a long while. He would bring up politics again and again and I would patronize him and not get excited about it. I would even meet him at the Diner and pay him his fee and treat him because sometimes I would be tired. Well, early August we were at the Diner and he started getting loud and making a scene about F'n politics again! My jaw dropped and the people around us were staring at us. What the hell is wrong with people? I just don't get it. Anyway the naysayers were basically correct nearly 2 years ago. I've broken it off completely. It just mindboggling that anyone would persist like he does. I was willing to back up this guy to the hilt and I have means. I'm not a psychologist and can't comprehend the mentality of this kid. I do realize now he just has contempt for me and while I'm generally not a door mat, I let him control the relationship way too much. Thanks guys.

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