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Caught in a place without lube and just gotta jerk off? Plain old spit just not helpful enough?


I've discovered that corn oil works. I'm guessing any kind of cooking oil will do the trick (don't try it with penetration, though. I think it would compromise a condom.)


But what if I'm overhauling a carburetor with Mike Rowe


and he says he wants me to cum on his chest. NOW.


I'd be dubious about reaching for motor oil, but gosh I'd be tempted if HE was asking.




Are there any other handy, household substitutes I haven't mentioned?

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For jerking off? Soap of course and Dish washing liquid Hand cream Any manner of food (fruits with juice, chocolate pudding, twinkies, canned baked bean etc) lip gloss. Where that is a wank there is a way.

I have never seen a purplekow :)

I hope I never see one ;)

But I can tell you this and how I would rather see than be one :D


Help there is a purplekow in my mirror :eek:

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