50: To Speedo, or not to Speedo?

[+ friendofsheila]

Yes, fans, that it the question.

 

How does a man know whether to wear one after age 50? Is there a pair of calipers I can buy to measure something?

 

A wall chart I can stand up against to see if my butt is bulbous enough?

 

Or will I have to stand under a harsh light and under the glare of one of those queens who thinks she knows who should do what and when, and wait for a verdict?

[corndog]

I would say that if you have any doubt whatsoever then the answer to the question is "NO."

[Juan Vancouver]

My dear Friendofsheila,

 

I am going to write something that might send some NorthAmerican sensibilities into a frenzied tizzy. I say fuck rules, fuck sensibilities, fuck aesthetics, fuck what others might think. I wholeheartedly recommend you to try on a few different pairs of bathing suits and when you find the one with which you feel the best, the most comfortable, the sexiest, the most mobile then commit to it and wear it with pride. Beyond abs, much father than herculean glutes and a behemoth of a bulge, there is nothing sexier than confidence, relaxation and to see a man who is at peace with what he is wearing, owns it and asks for nobody's permission.

 

Life is so punily short, hard and elusively fleeting to waste any second of it.

 

May you find the sexiest, most amazing pair that makes you feel that you love who you are now.

 

Beach power to you, my brother!

[bigvalboy]

Yes, fans, that it the question.

 

How does a man know whether to wear one after age 50? Is there a pair of calipers I can buy to measure something?

 

A wall chart I can stand up against to see if my butt is bulbous enough?

 

Or will I have to stand under a harsh light and under the glare of one of those queens who thinks she knows who should do what and when, and wait for a verdict?

 

Very simple. Take a trusting friend to the store with you. Put a pair on, then turn facing away from him and ask "Do these speedo's make me look fat?" You will quickly have your answer.

[marylander1940]

unless you're in Brazil or Kazakhstan, don't do it!

 

http://m.gmgrd.co.uk/sbres/101.$plit/C_67_article_2040753_body_articleblock_0_bodyimage.jpg?05%2F12%2F2008%2010%3A14%3A29%3A079

[Diverdan]

I have to agree with Juan, whose advise is always spot on. But put another way, I think we all know when wearing a speedo does nothing for us or anyone who looks at us. I don't think it is a matter of age. I have seen many guys 50 and over that look terrific in speedos, and seen guys in their 20s and 30s who should never wear one. I suggest that you look at the wonderful post that Unicorn assembled for my benefit, and the rest of you as well, referring to bulges. Some of those are in speedos, and others are not, but all are enticing. So find what you like, what you like when you look in the mirror and then be comfortable and confident whether in the pool, at the beach or where ever you might want to wear that attire.

DD

[+ Travis69]

Or will I have to stand under a harsh light and under the glare of one of those queens who thinks she knows who should do what and when, and wait for a verdict?

Those queens will tell you you're clothing, car, furniture, pet, hair style, shampoo, sheets, drapes, dates, eating habits, job, china, crystal, jewelry, toilet paper, bath towels and vacation spots are all wrong also.

[Juan Vancouver]

Those queens will tell you you're clothing, car, furniture, pet, hair style, shampoo, sheets, drapes, dates, eating habits, job, china, crystal, jewelry, toilet paper, bath towels and vacation spots are all wrong also.

 

Truer words have never been uttered. I think the secret is finding the voice of those "queens" inside of our head and silencing it. They will always be displeased with everything in life, but as long as we learn to be embracing and pleased with what is, we will be one step ahead.

 

Let'em bitch. (Cause they will.)

[+ purplekow]

Here is a song that should give you a guide I am sure that if you are 50 you will sign along to a very attractive singer whose look is very of the times

[foxy]

I love to swim in pools and the ocean. For me comfort of movement in the water is more important than looks. So a few years ago I bought myself a pair of loose fitting bathing trunks and cut out all the support stuff inside. So it's like swimming naked. I love speedos for those that look good in them regardless of age but look honestly in a mirror before you wear them in public.

[+ sam.fitzpatrick]

I was a swimmer in high school and lifeguard in college. As a lifeguard, our uniform was a boxer-style trunk we were required to wear; however, we were also required to swim laps to maintain our fitness when I wore a Speedo.

 

I have always had two sets of swim suits - one when I plan to spend most of my time in the water which allows for a free range of motion in the water (not always a Speedo) and another when I plan to spend most of the time on the pool deck or beach to minimize the sunburn zone.

[+ Gar1eth]

I am not in the speedo crowd- never have been and most likely never will be unless something drastic happens and sometime in the next 10 years and I decide to either get a stomach stapling or go on some massive body reshaping- which truthfully ain't going to happen as I am now 53- and I 1st started telling myself I was going to get myself in shape at age 14 without ever being able to accomplish it. And even if I were in shape it's possible my underendowment would keep me from wearing a speedo.

 

But my question is how comfortable are they. They don't really seem so. I tried some semi skimpy underwear recently for a once in a lifetime f-ckbuddy relationship which is now over. They weren't very comfortable. I prefer the way my granny panties feel. Now that that one time relationship is over, I'm about to throw those two pair of skimpies away.

 

And while I often agree with Juan, in this case I feel too much self-confidence is a bad thing. There is no way I would inflict the sight of me in speedos on anyone. I wouldn't want to be responsible for them being struck blind- or for those who weren't blinded, drowning themselves because of an inability to eradicate the memory from their brains

 

Gman

[+ Chris Eisenhower]

Those queens will tell you you're clothing, car, furniture, pet, hair style, shampoo, sheets, drapes, dates, eating habits, job, china, crystal, jewelry, toilet paper, bath towels and vacation spots are all wrong also.

 

Ding. Wear whatever the fuck you want.

[bigvalboy]

Confident yes...but it's not a good look for her. ;)

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DIcmeO87T3Y

[+ Socalguy]

Ding. Wear whatever the fuck you want.

 

+100

 

...And that sir is how you become Escort of the Year!

[MscleLovr]

Confidence is key, as others have said, but I feel a relatively flat stomach helps carry off the 'look'. I'm older than the OP and I wear a Speedo to swim, but I feel a square-cut brief swimsuit is more flattering for us older men who spend time at the beach sunbathing.

[Samai139]

When you have to ask others if what you are wearing (fill in the blanks) "makes you look fat", "looks ridiculous", does nothing for you" etc., etc. then you should forget the clothing, be it Speedos, skinny jeans, tight polos, baseballcaps, and so on.

Confidence may make you FEEL great, it doesn't make you LOOK great. After a certain age, there are parts which will betray you---no matter how much you exercise, diet, go under the knife. Accept it and most of all enjoy the luxury of being comfortable in your skin and not making others' crawl.

[Epigonos]

There was a time when I wore Speedos and looked good in them. Unfortunately that time is L-O-N-G gone. How do I know that time is L-O-N-G gone? My mirror doesn't lie!!!!!

[+ Charlie]

I wear Speedos at home in the privacy of my own pool, because I feel they are the most comfortable way to swim (and when the sun goes down, I swim naked). But since I am waaay past fifty, at a public pool or beach, I feel more comfortable psychologically wearing a more conservative bathing suit, for the same reason that I would feel silly wearing the tight t-shirts that I wore for cruising when I was in my 20s. Sometime in my 50s, I realized that even though my body shape hadn't changed much since my youth, my attitude toward exhibiting it had. So, wear what makes you feel comfortable.

[+ Gar1eth]

I wear Speedos at home in the privacy of my own pool, because I feel they are the most comfortable way to swim (and when the sun goes down, I swim naked). But since I am waaay past fifty, at a public pool or beach, I feel more comfortable psychologically wearing a more conservative bathing suit, for the same reason that I would feel silly wearing the tight t-shirts that I wore for cruising when I was in my 20s. Sometime in my 50s, I realized that even though my body shape hadn't changed much since my youth, my attitude toward exhibiting it had. So, wear what makes you feel comfortable.

 

And then there are those of us (ME! ME! ME!) who never wore tight t-shirts and never went cruising. But Charlie, I say if you still have the body for it, you should do it.

 

Gman

[JT Brooklyn]

unless you're in Brazil or Kazakhstan, don't do it!

 

http://m.gmgrd.co.uk/sbres/101.$plit/C_67_article_2040753_body_articleblock_0_bodyimage.jpg?05%2F12%2F2008%2010%3A14%3A29%3A079

 

Indubidably! As we see on Beaches all over the World...90% of SPEEDO wearers should not!

[MrMiniver]

I don't care if one looks like Steve Reeves at 25, no one over 45 should be wearing a speedo. No matter how good you think it looks or no matter how good it actually looks ... it's still a middle aged man wearing the garment of youth.

[+ Funguy]

So how did all you guys do at Helios a few weeks ago??????

[Juan Vancouver]

I don't care if one looks like Steve Reeves at 25, no one over 45 should be wearing a speedo. No matter how good you think it looks or no matter how good it actually looks ... it's still a middle aged man wearing the garment of youth.

 

"The small man

Builds cages for everyone

He Knows.

 

While the sage,

Who has to duck his head

When the moon is low,

Keeps dropping keys all night long

For the

Beautiful

Rowdy

Prisoners."

 

--Hafiz

[bobchitown]

They have these newfangled things now called mirrors. Use one.