Escort Dress Codes?

[+ nycman]

I read with interest a review today where the reviewer mentions the inappropriate dress of the escort who came to his hotel:

 

"He appeared at my upscale hotel dressed like a young skateboarder"

 

I have also experienced escorts who seem to be unable to comprehend (or care about?) the need to dress appropriately for the situation. To me it is clear that if you're meeting at the Four Season Hotel and you're going to dinner at the latest upscale hot spot then you should wear appropriate clothes. Some escorts show up looking more like they're on their way to be a go-go boy at the Roxy.

 

Muscle-T's just don't work at Jean-Georges...ya know?

 

While this may seem like common sense to the client, it is not always clear to the escort. I took the lessons I’ve learned from the many articles written here on how bad pre-date communications can ruin the sexual fun and applied it to the entire date. As a result, I’ve become more bold, explicit, and happy with my dates. Just like the sex part of the encounter…if you’ve got special requests for the date…make them clear up front. Assume that he’s going to show up at your “upscale” hotel in cutoffs and a wife beater T-shirt (don’t laugh, it happens!) and take it from there. These days if it’s an “upscale” evening, I tell the escort exactly how I expect him to dress when I make the appointment. I don't demand or expect Armani suits, but wearing a nice button down shirt and dress shoes is a good start.

 

If the evening is particularly important or “very upscale” I even allow time for a 1-hour emergency pit stop at Brooks Brothers just in case. I'm sure some escorts find this behavior condensing, but most seem to be thankful and happy to adapt. Hell, it can’t be any worse that being asked to wear leather chaps with your ass hanging out. Anyways, how bad can it be to have someone buy you a new shirt and dress pants?

 

In the above review, I’m sure the escort would have worn just about anything the client asked him to. In my opinion it’s the client’s fault for not making it clear what he wanted. You cannot expect these boys, some of whom ARE very young and not used to high society, to know all the social dress codes.

 

Needless to say, I was not raised in “high society” or even in an “upscale setting”. I was, however, relentlessly hassled for years by a very distinguished gay gentleman until I could sit still at the dinner table and not play with my cufflinks....funny, he never minded if I played with my nipple ring during dinner though (a bad habit I still have)...now I'm very thankful he cared enough and was patient enough to teach me.

 

Don't even get me started on escort table manners...is there a "Miss Manner's Guide to Being an Escort"?...my new publishing career awaits!

[Traveller]

I pretty much usually just prefer nude and hard, with a shit-assed grin on their face.

 

Later.

 

PS. Cory did know which fork to use at Danube if you're looking for a dining companion for the weekend. I believe he's potty trained too.

[Guest Merlin]

If the escort knows he is going out to dinner, he should dress accordingly. But if he thought it was an encounter in the room he may have thought the skateboarder look would be appreciated. Many of us would like the look.

[Guest Tampa Yankee]

You are right nycman, if a client has expectations or concerns about dress then it is encumbent on him to make it known beforehand. After all, he is the one who is planning the evening.

 

I'm easygoing, so what is important to me is cleanliness and good grooming with maybe a hint of neetness, whatever is worn. Overly rumpled or tattered clothing can be a distracting, be it a tux or skater's attire.

 

As far as dress codes go... have you attended a Broadway show lately? You'll find everything from the tux to shorts and Hawaiian shirts. You are not sure if you are on Broadway or at WallyWorld. Times... they are a changin'.

 

Early in my escort experiences I had a gentleman arrive late one evening at my suburban DC hotel dressed entirely in vinyl -- a bright yellow jacket and black pants. He was most proud of the outfit and insisted on modelling it for me -- all the while I was horrified, thinking there is no way he got past the front desk unnoticed... they'd would have to have been blind. And when I say unnoticed I mean UNNOTICED!! -- it was obvious he wasn't delivering Chinese carry-out. That night I decided if I was uncomfortable with what I was doing then I shouldn't do it. Then and there I put that issue behind me and haven't looked back. Now when I book a room I always book for two -- I have nothing to hide and don't want to be botthered later by pissy questions from some busy-body clerk. And I never have been bothered. And if Carmen Miranda shows at my door, then I'd better be ready to Rhumba if I haven't been specific about dress beforehand.

[Guest LAPrada]

On the flip side, clients should also remember to dress appropriately when meeting an escort. This thread was basically started because of Andreas of DC's response to his client.

 

I don't buy the "Since I'm paying, I can do/dress however I want" garb. Sorry. Escorts are human beings. For someone to meet an escort for the first time in NOTHING but a pair of boxers is really disrespectful of the escort. You would think that someone at the age of 60 would have a little more respect than that. Unless it's part of some kinky fantasy and the escort is forewarned, it's just totally tacky... kinda like "Dude, you're only here for sex... let's get to it".

 

TACKY!

[Guest Merlin]

LAPrada that is the first time I have heard an escort comment on the clothing of the client. So I am glad you gave your opinion. I always take a shower immediately before the escort arrives and put on boxer shorts and a shirt. Sometimes I have worn a bathrobe instead but it is too bulky if I am traveling. Would escorts prefer I be fully dressed? It never occurred to me that shorts and a shirt would be objectionable.

[Guest Tampa Yankee]

LaPrada,

 

Couldn't agree with you more.

[+ nycman]

I agree LAPrada. Although I'm not an escort, I would find it a bit disrespectful to arrive and find the client 1/2 dressed (unless of course that was part of the previously discussed "scene").

 

Last time I checked it only takes me two seconds to put on a pair of pants and a shirt...and two seconds to take them off...is that really too much to ask?

 

Plus I find getting undressed with another man to be part of the fun...just my 2 cents worth.

[Guest LAPrada]

>LAPrada that is the first time

>I have heard an escort

>comment on the clothing of

>the client.

 

LOL... Hmmmmmm... I just became an escort without even realizing it! :>

 

Although I do occasionally make the Rick Munroe/Scott Matthews rate, I do it via commercial acting and commercial print. No, I'm not Tom Cruise, but some of you guys may recognize my face from some national spots (Miller Beer, Dr. Pepper, Old Navy, Lexus).

 

I am not an escort, nor a client.... just a bored individual with a laptop inbetween flights or auditions. Hooboy, your site is a blast! Very entertaining. I did hire escorts twice, but both times they didn't charge... what a treat!! Wait, maybe that technically makes me a client?!

 

Anyway, if we ever have a SAG strike again, I may have to win over a Seal of Approval from Hooboy... or take BillyBoy's away!

 

But going back to the original topic, taking the clothes off is MAJOR fun... why answer the door semi-nekkid? Tragic.

[Guest sam]

In fact, I find nothing hotter (well, maybe not quite nothing... , than to have the escort help me undress! Some of them do it very well...it can be a very sexy experience.

 

As for the appropriate dress thread, I do remember some times when I felt it was a bit awkward for an escort to arrive showing all of his talents at a very upscale hotel. I would prefer to think the bellman wasn't exactly aware of what my taste in companions was all about (muscle, muscle, muscle). However, I have to agree that these days anything goes just about anywhere.

[CT Dick]

> it's just totally tacky...

>kinda like "Dude, you're only

>here for sex... let's get

>to it".

 

I agree 100%. Unless the scene is prearranged, a gentleman receives his caller dressed.

[MiamiLooker]

>"Dude, you're only

>here for sex...

 

What else would he be there for?

[+ nycman]

>>"Dude, you're only

>>here for sex...

>

>What else would he be there

>for?

 

Note to all escorts...when showing up for a meeting with MiamiLooker it is best to arrive wearing noting but a jockstrap. Ring the doorbell and then quickly turn around and grab your ankles while you wait for him to answer the door...smile

[+ nycman]

>As far as dress codes go...

>have you attended a Broadway

>show lately? You'll find

>everything from the tux to

>shorts and Hawaiian shirts. You

>are not sure if you

>are on Broadway or at

>WallyWorld. Times... they are a

>changin'.

 

Someone else made this point in another thread. They said something along the lines of "when was the last time people dressed just to walk through a hotel lobby". Let’s see…that would be…ummm…last night?

 

I agree that these days when it comes to dress codes just about anything goes, just about everywhere. Nevertheless, can and should are too different words. Just because I CAN wear a Hawaiian shirt into a Broadway theatre or cutoffs in the lobby of the Four Seasons doesn't mean I SHOULD.

 

I still strongly believe that the clothes make the man and the event. Recently, I was at a "black tie" benefit in NYC with around 1,000 people in attendance. Unfortunately, I would say about 5-10% of the people were not dressed appropriately for a black tie event. The tickets started at $1,000 a piece. I had a hard time believing a couple would shell out $2,000 for an event only to show up looking like an underdressed Neanderthals. What's the point?

 

Yes, you can dress however you wish in most places these days. It doesn’t mean you should. Class is class and tacky belongs in trailer parks. Many men underrate the importance of dressing well, much to there own detriment. You may not think anyone notices or cares but I’m afraid you are very wrong.

 

Don't get me started on the women’s clothes...a green stretch mini as formal eveningwear? Ahhhhhh…..!

[+ Lucky]

There was a very hot young escort many years ago who showed up at my office in hot pants and a tight tank top...just dropping by to say hello! Since it was a very large office, I pushed him into the staircase, said hello, and returned to my office. No one said a word!

[Justice]

LaPrada and NYCMan I couldn't agree with you more. It is a lot of fun undressing in front of another man. :9 (One of my favorite escorts recently ran a little late and was still showering when I arrived at his apartment. His boyfriend kept me company while I waited. My date said hello, while wrapped in a towel, got dressed and some thirty seconds later performed a stip tease for me. Very nice. Very classy.)

[MiamiLooker]

Nyc,

I've never had anyone show up at the front door of my house in just a jock strap, but I did have a guy show up in just a pair of speedos. Luckily, my house was somewhat secluded, so I don't think any of my neighbors spotted him. I gave him a pair of my shorts to wear when he left. As a matter of fact, I was sort of responsible for this guy getting into "the business" and he never even knew; but that's a whole other story....

[Guest LG320126]

Miami, can I have his name and number? I melt at the sight of a hot guy in speedos and would have probably lost it right there at the door.

[Rod Hagen]

I don't understand why just because someone is gay, it gives him license to dress like a moron. What type of idiot wears those god-awful racing-stripe nylon sweat pants to an upper east side to an apartment where the client most likely has a doorman (whom he knows well)? In WeHo we see these idiots walking around all the time; strutting in tank tops despite the fact that it's FREEZING out. Just cuz they're gay.

 

For that matter, how come gay restaurants get away with serving really shitty food just because it's "gay" (Cobalts comes to mind)?

 

And films, why are the vast majority of gay films such shite? I don't believe that every gay movie can be the next Beautiful Thing or (I wish) STEAM, but do we really need another Hustler White or Natural History of Parking Lots or Green Plaid Shirt?

 

Ok, sorry, got off on a tangent. To sum up: If you are going to eat at 21 Club, wear a NORMAL tie. If you don't know what a normal tie is, ask the people at Men's Warehouse (or better yet, Brooks Brothers). If your client thinks that your tank top, while flattering, was an inappropriate choice for a call to The Penninsula at 8pm on a Saturday night, don't blame him, you fucked up.

 

-Hagen

 

http://www.rodhagen.com

[Rod Hagen]

>Muscle-T's just don't work at Jean-Georges...ya

>know?

 

Neither does the food. I've been there 3 times now and each time I have been horribley dissapointed. If you want upscale, but actually delicious, NYC-French food eat at Chanterelle or Bouley Bakery. I'm told that Lutece and Lespinasse are nice. Avoid at all costs Le Cirque, Jean Georges, Daniel (I'm told) and Aquavit. They suck.

 

Other great, but not french, upscale NYC spots: Danube (best food in NYC), 21 Club (best service of any establishment anywhere in America), and Peter Luger (steaks are MUCH better than at The Palm).

 

http://www.rodhagen.com

[Traveller]

Hagan,

Have to disagree with you on Daniel and Jean-Georges. Chanterelle is nice and romantic. Gotham Bar & Grill is still one of my favorites. Went to Le Bernardin recently for the first time in awhile. It really, really sucked.

 

Later.

 

PS. Checked out Naha in Chi-town last weekend. Very good.

[+ nycman]

Oh my Lord!

 

A man who knows that the steaks at Peter Luger are better than the Palm, that the service at 21 Club is amazing, and that one should "dress" for visiting a gentleman in his Upper East Side apartment?

 

Forget the thread on how to become friends with an escort...how do you marry one!?!

 

Oh...based in LA...exclusive top...I KNEW there was a catch!....smile.

[Guest Rastignac]

Chanterelle is my favorite, but the Union Square Cafe is very good also. Florent on Gansevoort is my neighborhood bistro. They serve great food for the price. The last time I was there I saw both Courtney Love and Monica Lewinsky (at different tables).

[Guest jizzdepapi]

coming out of the unfashionable closet too

 

i'm happy to report that i was voted the most unfashionable gay man anyone had ever met in my very gay-friendly office. i hang onto that distinction with great pride but not much effort.

 

some of my happiest days were spent in late '70s discos (anyone remember Sunday teadance at the Cockring on Christopher Street?) wheeling around in a pair of tattered (but clean) blue jeans with a clean but wrinkled teeshirt artfully stuffed in my back pocket. sneakers (strategically smudged and with worn, laundered laces) were required. poppers (the real thing then) were optional.

 

for dressup, I kept the teeshirt on.

 

since then, for business meetings and the like, i have found that navy blue solves most quandries and, when in NYC, wear black so no one knows you took the subway. i figured out on my own that there was something about navy blue suits and brown dress shoes that didn't quite add up.

 

for casual wear, my motto is "if it's clean and it fits, wear it." i do remember my mother's admonitions about mixing plaids, florals and geometrics--only did that once but her withering glance filled me in immediately. one of my pet peeves about casual clothing is labels. if the label isn't on the inside, i don't buy it. so i just never got a taste for designer wear of any kind.

 

marshall's, men's wearhouse, filene's basement, tj maxx are just fine for me. early on while i was equipping myself for business, i even found a few quality wool suits and sport coats at tag sales (gasp!) and salvation army (double gasp!) to which my seamstress and i lovingly ministered.

 

am i gay?

 

jizz

[Guest jizzdepapi]

working-class fare

 

the most delicious meal i have every enjoyed in nyc was broiled red snapper at a dominican restaurant named el caribe (145th and broadway). it was accompanied by light and tasty mofongos (deep-fried sweet bananas); think they might skip the pork mixture which puerto rican restaurants use. skipping the wine (though Concho y Toro chilean wine is tempting with or without a meal), i headed straight for the guanabana juice (surely the ugliest but most delicious fruit the goddess ever invented); make sure they blend it with milk and ice. You could substitute guava juice if you want; make sure to ask what they have that is NOT on the menu.

 

i shared my meal with my papi, who in turn, shared his soupy rice (a Dominican staple) with chicken. delicious also. and of course, rice and beans.

 

total ticket, about $15 per person. tableclothes with glass tops, and working-class papis to die for (they are extra, i would imagine). nice salsa and meringue though i guess i would need to visit santo domingo to hear any beethoven or mozart.

 

anyway, i highly recommend this place and you CAN wear just about anything you like.

 

one tip--do NOT be tempted to use any of the bargain-rate hotels in washington heights; that might change in the future.

 

jizz