Unanswered E-Mail Requests

[Guest HIker]

This is the first time I've looked for the services of an escort and have been rather frustrated that three escorts I've attempted to contact via e-mail have not responded. I assume they are active since two of them have had reviews here in the past few days. In a couple messages I tried to express what I was looking for and my limited expectations. Since ths is a first for me I'm wondering if there's some protocol I'm missing in contacting potential escorts. (I'm looking for an escort in the Dallas area for next month.) To compound my own feelings of frustration I am in my 50s and am looking for my first "experience" with a man. (I was quite comforted by the thread in the "Deli" forum about "Escorts for Older Guys" and the one in this forum "Virgins and Escorts" - both pretty reassuring.)

 

Anyway, does anyone has any advice on asking and getting a response from escorts? Is it better to wait until a week or so before a trip than to try to set a time early? Any help/advice would be appreciated.

 

Hiker

[Guest Traveler]

>Anyway, does anyone has any advice

>on asking and getting a

>response from escorts? Is

>it better to wait until

>a week or so before

>a trip than to try

>to set a time early?

> Any help/advice would be

>appreciated.

 

I would say that 2 or 3 weeks before you go should be fine, but there's nothing wrong with sending an e-mail a month before to get a feel for the escorts out there. I feel it's probably best not to e-mail them frequently for a month because that's not the escort's role, unless the escort initiates it. Most escorts would probably feel very honored to be the first, so I would tell them.

I personally feel that not answering an e-mail, other than spam or an insult, is very rude. Of course, an escort could be on a trip somewhere when he can't answer e-mail (i.e. a cruise). Otherwise, I would definitely never consider an escort who didn't answer his e-mail. It takes so little time to answer an e-mail (and a person generally checks his e-mail when he's got a little time, unlike a phone call which can happen anytime), that I don't see much of an excuse for answering an e-mail. Again, one should allow that a person may be on vacation in which he can't answer...

[BewareofNick]

There's another possibility here too (especially if you are on AOL and this happens ALL the time.) You need to check your mail preferences because you may have non-AOL e-mail blocked. Your escorts may very well have written you back, but their mail got bounced.

[Guest HIker]

Thanks - that is actually one I had thought of. Although I am currently on AOL (free trial) my primary email goes through a generic ISP. But, you did remind me to check that preference while I am on AOL.

 

Thanks again.

Hiker

[Guest MrB]

Traveler and BewareOfNick both make good points. A third possibility is that you're emailing guys who are flooded with emails every day and who only respond when your questions sounds like real business. (I am not coming to the defence of escorts who are not responsive--they really should be--just trying to explain). Make sure your email is specific about where and when and for how long you want to get together, and lets the guy have your hotel and your name. That usually helps.

 

Have fun!

 

 

MrB

[Guest HIker]

I'd wondered about the possibility of they're being away (vacation, etc.) also but I did see one of the escorts on AOL a day or so ago.

 

Then again, as Nick just mentioned below, since both these guys have AOL e-mail maybe their preferences of for only AOL messages and are rejecting my non-AOL e-mail. Given that, a quick note to ask might be in order (I'm thinking out loud here).

 

Thanks

Hiker

[Guest HIker]

Good point - I wan't really very specific. I'll give it another shot since I do know dates, hotel, etc.

 

Hiker

[Rod Hagen]

I have an AOL screenname, but bulk delete alll aol email w/out reading it. I have one escort email address people can find via my webpage and this site. But if by chance they stumble across my aol email and try to contactr me that way, they are shit out of luck. After losing my account 3 times for having controversial (read "gay" or "escort") profiles. I just got tired of using aol for anything other than quick hookups. AOL should be destroyed.

 

If an escort has an AOL email address, it's safer to just call them. If their number isn't available, IM them. AOL email is a LAST resort in my NOT so humble opinion. Good Luck.

 

 

HAGEN

 

http://www.rodhagen.com

[Justice]

LAST EDITED ON Mar-18-01 AT 06:31PM (EST)[p]LAST EDITED ON Mar-18-01 AT 01:50 PM (EST)

 

Hi!

 

I did not see my first escort until October 2000, so my experience is somewhat limited. He worked for an agency, which was very good about responding to my many e-mails. Although I have recommended that agency on this Board and would use them again myself, I decided that I would try to hire someone who worked on his own. The first two guys that I e-mailed never responded, so I know exactly what you're going through. :-( (My initial e-mail describes what I'm looking for in very general terms, but I do make sure that it includes enough information for the escort to know exactly what he's getting into.) (I'm sure that most good escorts get a lot of e-mail, however it would still be nice to get some feedback -- even if its only a polite "No Thank You.") I struck paydirt on my third attempt. My very general e-mail resulted in a response that was friendly and enthusiastic :7, so much so that I sent a followup e-mail which described a very detailed fantasy scene. }> The response was even more enthusiastic. :7 We eventually got together and a good time was had by all. We've scheduled a second date and we're both looking forward to seeing each other again. (At his suggestion, I've also gotten together with his partner. I'm seeing him again too. }>) I still find it hard to believe how lucky I got. :9

 

The whole point of this post is to say "Hang in there." Don't get discouraged. You will eventually find someone who'll not only respond to you, but who'll knock your socks off when you get together. ;-)

 

Good luck and have fun and please keep us posted!

[Rick Munroe]

>If an escort has an AOL

>email address, it's safer to

>just call them. If

>their number isn't available, IM

>them. AOL email is

>a LAST resort in

>my NOT so humble opinion.

 

 

I've been on AOL for 2 years, since I started escorting, and have never had a problem. I also answer all inquiries. I never go into the AOL chat rooms and rarely IM...that is usually a waste of time, in my experience.

[Guest HIker]

Thanks for the encouragement. It helps to know others have experienced the same issues. Yup, I'll keep trying right up until I get to Dallas.

 

Hiker

[Matt_Vancouver]

shameless self promotion

 

Well aol or not, if they can't figure out how to get to their email, they shouldn't be on the net: )

I'm not on aol, and I do answer all my email, I've only been to Dallas once, and I would be honored to be your first experience into the wonderful world of male2male sex: )

ok enough of this shamelessness.(you're all thinking 'sheesh he's back in full force': )

Usually a month in advance for a travel appointment is best, because most escorts are booked sporadically for periods of up to three months, so in order to find someone that has the same availability as what you are looking for, may take some time.

Good luck, and I hope your first is memorable.

http://go.to/mattsplace

matt_escort@yahoo.com

[Justice]

LAST EDITED ON Mar-18-01 AT 06:28PM (EST)[p]I also hate AOL. I would use snail mail before using AOL as my ISP. (I currently have a cable modem. I don't have a dialup backup any more, but I can guarantee you that my backup service would be ANYONE other than AOL.) I can't help wondering -- if you hate AOL so much why are you still using them? You live in LA. There has to be dozens of other ISPs available to you.

[Guest bigjake80]

Although it is rude to not answer mail, the fact that you are not getting a response could depend on what is is you are saying. I get mail all the time that says something like 'I think you are really hot and Ill be in NY next month." I have found answering this kind of mail a huge waste of my time. Now, if I get something from someone saying "Here are my dates, I want to schedule something" that will get my attention. Usually then I will send them my entire schedule for the specific dates that they ask for and let them choose. As far as questions that you need answered, if you are asking about specific sexual acts or asking about someting that is already covered on the web page, chances are it will be ignored. I never answer questions about sexual acts because its one of the contributing factors to make an arrest. Not to mention that I find it insulting. I cover everyting on my web page. I am protected by the first amendment as far as the web page itself is concerned. I can say whatever I want on it. What they need is for you to actually make the deal verbally or in writting. Otherwise they would just come to all of our doors and arrest us. Anyway, thats off the subject. Really, if they dont respond, then move on. They may be busy, out of town or just not interested.

[Rod Hagen]

>other than AOL.) I can't

>help wondering -- if you

>hate AOL so much wh

 

Hi Justice,

 

Like I said, I just use AOL for McSex, not escorting. But some gentlemen I interview via IMs for McSex recognize my screenname AND my photo and put 2 and 2 together; "HEY, you're Rod Hagen". OOPS!

 

Pacbell DSL is my ISP and I have my own domain at leandream1@rodhagen.com

 

 

http://www.rodhagen.com

[Rod Hagen]

>go into the AOL chat

>rooms and rarely IM...that is

>usually a waste of time,

>in my experience.

 

Nearly 2 years ago when I first started escorting and did not have Rodhagen.com I hung out in Escortsm4m, et al, chat rooms ALOT. I used to get LOTS more business out of those chatrooms than print ads. Also hanging out there gave me something to do while bored in the office during the day.

 

But I totally agree with you Rick that they are now too crowded, result in too much "sex" junkmail, and generally a waste of time.

 

 

http://www.rodhagen.com

[Guest Traveler]

>Although it is rude to not

>answer mail, the fact that

>you are not getting a

>response could depend on what

>it is you are saying.

>I get mail all the

>time that says something like

>'I think you are really

>hot and Ill be in

>NY next month." I have

>found answering this kind of

>mail a huge waste of

>my time.

 

May I suggest it might be worth 60 seconds to send a brief message saying something to the effect of "Thanks for the compliment. Let me know when you have some dates available"? Few business people expect 100% response to their advertising, but some escorts never cease to amaze me by only being cordial if they feel fairly certain they'll get business from someone who contacts them. There's something to be said for building up good will.

One example is escorts who don't want to send their picture to people unless they're confident the guy wants to hire him immediately (i.e. "No picture collectors" messages). I mean, why they would care that somebody might jack off over their picture without hiring them is beyond me. If someone wants to jack off over my picture, I'm flattered.

Even if only one person in ten with vague requests or picture requests ends up hiring you, it's worthwhile to be cordial, since it really doesn't take much effort. My advice is to just be nice, and take in stride those who don't hire you.

I totally agree with you about not discussing specific sexual activity by e-mail. This would be especially true if your website addresses your preferences.

[Guest HIker]

To All,

 

Guys, thanks for all the responses - I had hoped for maybe one or two when I posted my message. I think I've picked up a number of tips on e-mail usage when requesting time with an escort. I hadn't expected the number of responses on only one day that have appeared.

 

Anyway, I'll try once more with a reques to the first individual I e-mailed, this time being more specific in terms of dates and the desire to actually schedule time. If there's still no response then I'll move on. This has been a wonderful learning experience thus far.

 

Thanks again for the encouragement - and don't stop with the advice. After all - I (and many others like me) are new to this.

 

Hiker

[Justice]

LAST EDITED ON Mar-18-01 AT 09:33PM (EST)[p]>I totally agree with you about

>not discussing specific sexual activity

>by e-mail. This would

>be especially true if your

>website addresses your preferences.

 

I agree it is VERY dangerous to discuss specifics in an e-mail.:-( Unfortunately, however, some escorts don't have web sites. Also, there's more than a few web sites that describe what the escort is willing to do in very general terms. My practice has been to send an e-mail that describes what I'm looking for in the most general terms. I also mention that I would like to contact the escort via phone and ask when the best time to call is. I follow-up with a very detailed response that does describe what I'm looking for. The scene that I did with the escort from the agency included a request that he wear specific clothing right down to his underwear. The one thing that I am very careful about is the discussion about money. That's always done in a separate conversation after every other detail is worked out.

[Justice]

You're very welcome. That's what this place is all about. You must of pushed all of the right buttons, because you've managed to attract responses from some of the best escorts in the business. ;-)

[Guest HQ]

>I have an AOL screenname, but

>bulk delete alll aol email

>w/out reading it. I

>have one escort email address

>people can find via my

>webpage and this site.

>But if by chance they

>stumble across my aol email

>and try to contactr me

>that way, they are shit

>out of luck. After

>losing my account 3 times

>for having controversial (read "gay"

>or "escort") profiles. I just

>got tired of using aol

>for anything other than quick

>hookups. AOL should be

>destroyed.

>

Rod, If you bulk delete all email on your AOL account as noted then why not just go to preferences and "Block" all mail? This would also assist you in getting potential clients to respond to the correct address that you list. After all if I was new to the Internet and happened to be on AOL, saw your profile, sent you an email, then received no response I would feel you had no interest and stop trying to contact you. Yet if the mail did not get delivered it would force me to look for an alternative contact source. Just a suggestion as you might be losing wanted business with your current method.

[Justice]

LAST EDITED ON Mar-18-01 AT 10:59PM (EST)[p]>Like I said, I just use

>AOL for McSex, not escorting.

 

I could have sworn that I recently came across one of your ads that included an AOL e-mail address. I was right. I just did a search using http://www.dogpile.com and look what I found:

 

Rod Hagen...

Your Lean Dream

26 yrs. old, 170 lbs.,

5 '10", 16" arms,

29" waist, 40" Chest,

24" Legs, 5% Body Fat. Professional companion and escort based in

Los Angeles. Respectful

and straightforward.

Not a hustler.

 

310-360-9890

leandream1@aol.com

 

See what's behind his cap in our playroom and then visit his website.

 

Main

 

The ad is running on http://www.perfectmen.com. I wonder how many jobs your missing out on because of your policy to bulk delete AOL

e-mail? Also since you just had a birthday, don't you think that you should update the ad? (Happy belated 28th!) Cute picture by the way. ;-)

[Guest bigjake80]

>If an escort has an AOL

>email address, it's safer to

>just call them. If

>their number isn't available, IM

>them. AOL email is

>a LAST resort in

>my NOT so humble opinion.

 

You are gonna have to speak for yourself on this one. Ive used AOL for years. Ive had a few probs here and there, so I modified it to work for me. The fact is that AOL is widely accessed by all age groups, and AOL has to protect themselves. At the same time, AOL is widely used by gay men looking to get laid and therefore is a useful tool. You are not ignoring AOL requests for your service. You are ignoring people looking for service using your "McSex" address. There is a difference. You are saying that everyone on AOL is going to ignore them like you do.

[Guest HIker]

Hmmm. That's me - an instigator, but I do feel a bit humbled. Glad I could accomplish a couple things. Generate a good discussion, and learn something at the same time.

 

Hiker

[Rod Hagen]

>e-mail? Also since you just had

>a birthday, don't you think

>that you should update the

>ad?

 

Not to mention that 29" waist

 

>(Happy belated 28th!) Cute

>picture by the way. ;-)

 

THANKS :-)

 

 

 

http://www.rodhagen.com