How dumb are we?

[Guest EWC]

I've tried to resist getting involved in this thread, but alas it is irresistable.

 

Why is it that no one commenting on this issue, either from the client or escort side hasn't speculated that it is entirely possible, if not probable for the shoe to be on the other foot.

 

Leaving aside the true assholes on either side of the table and assuming that there is respect and mutual benefit coming to both ends of the transaction, some of the true benefits of being the john rather than the trick are: You're not the one waiting for the phone to ring, you get to make the choice of who you want to spend your time with, the escort is expected to give you a good time rather than the other way around, the relationship is usually at your convenience rather than theirs, and never having to do sit ups.

 

Additionally, I would guess that the profile of the typical client is much closer to someone who doesn't particularly want to find a new relationship because a: they have one already and this is just a fling on the side, or b: they like uninvolved sex and they either don't have the time or are not looking for a relationship at this time.

 

The escort would almost certainly be someone who is able to look beyond the physical body into the person, and would be much more likely to see something that they find attractive in the sense that they want to know more, rather than the client who chose the escort based on looks in the first place. Once you get to know someone, there has to be more than looks to continue a relationship.

 

A final thought is that when the unthinkable happens and lines are crossed it would almost always involve the escort leaving his (or for that matter her) profession to go off into the world of the client rather than the other way around.

 

Friendship, is of course an entirely different matter. Being a professional I have friends that I see outside of the office that get billed just like everyone else when they are sitting in front of the the desk and friends that I see outside of their occupation who I pay when I utilize their services. I'm not sure why it's presumed to be more intimate to have sex with someone than to discuss ones criminal behavior, money or psychological problems, to have ones body probed and prodded, or to have ones teeth drilled. It frequently is of course, but not I suspect for escorts.

[adriano46]

Joey and Rod,

 

You both are more than a cut above the rest, and I could not agree more with either of you : wisdom on both East and West Coasts. Without being presumptuous... I never once felt like a money machine with either of you: your company, our conversations on many topics, and above all both your personalities have been highlights of this year which is only a month old.

 

adriano

[adriano46]

PS - Joey it was ROD who DID IT TO ME!!!

 

And here I was trying to save my virtue for you - ohe well, I'll make sure you are #2.

[Guest Joey Ciccone]

>>Joey, it was ROD who DID IT TO ME!!!<<

 

Drat! Beaten to the punch again. I'll get you for this Rod Hagen!

 

>>And here I was trying to save my virtue for you - oh well, I'll make sure you are #2<<

 

I'm sure your many virtues are still in tact Adriano, and congratulations. If Rod is everything he's cracked up to be, you're no doubt still walking funny. And I don't mind being number two or number fifty two, as long as I get a shot at it. See you soon.

[Guest Joey Ciccone]

>>Mr. Ciccone, sir, my esteem for you and my determination to meet you one day has just gone up yet another notch<<

 

Thanks a bunch, deej. Can't wait to see just how determined you are. Which reminds me, I might also be in need of a, um, *favor*, sometime soon.......

jc

(thanks to you too Rod. can't wait for that cup of coffee)

[Justice]

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>Justice, where is your self

>respect?

 

Not too worry. My self respect is very much intact.

 

It is toally inappropriate

>for an escort to respond

>by saying "contact me when you

>are ready to schedule a

>regular appointmant." Any decent

>escort whom you see regularly

>would have not reponded that way.

 

The comment was made very early in my relationship with the escort. Taken out of context, it does seem like a very harsh, and inappropriate comment. However, I can assure you that all previous and subsequent e-mails from the escort were friendly and enthusiastic. (I wouldn't have ended our relationship if that hadn't been true.) He probably was just having a bad day, which is something that he (and every other escort) is entitled to have. After all, he is a real person, with real feelings and real emotions. I wasn't offended by it. He really is a nice guy and I very much enjoyed our time together. I plan to see him again. I'm sorry that I even mentioned his remarks, they were very much out of character. I won't bring up his remarks when I write my review.

 

>On the other hand, you

>have to limit the number

>of times you contact just

>to talk to him to

> just a few.

 

That's exactly the point that I was trying to make. You worded your remarks much better than I did! (Note to self: never post first thing in the morning!Especially if you haven't had at least a half a pot of coffe first! :-))

 

Thanks for your concern.

[Justice]

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>Justice, I would not even think

>of seeing an escort who

>would respond to my call

>like that

 

He didn't respond to a phone call. He responded to an e-mail. I realize now, that taken out of context, his remarks seem very harsh and inappropriate. If this was my first encounter with him, I probably would have ended our relationship then and there. His previous and subsequent e-mails were on point, and very friendly and enthusiastic. I have a feeling that he was having a bad day (which is something that he and every other escort is entitled to have. After all they're only human and they have real feelings, real needs and real emotions. ) I took his comments with a grain of salt and decided to move on. He's really a very nice guy. I enjoyed my time with him very much.I plan on seeing him again. I'm sorry that I even mentioned his remarks, they were very much out of character. I won't include them in my review of him. (Note to self: NEVER post first thing in the morning. Especially before you've had at least a half of pot of coffee. :-))

 

 

 

As far as seeing

>escorts on a social basis,

>I spent an entire weekend

>recently in Las Vegas with

>one of my "friend" escorts

>- one of the best

>weekends I have ever had,

>not as his client, but

>as his friend, and he

>had actually altered his schedule

>to stay in town longer

>just due to me coming

>there. By the way,

>no money exchanged hands the

>entire weekend. This is

>why I think Smurf was

>off base to think that

>friendships cannot develop with escorts.

 

 

As with any professional relationship, the possibility of becoming friends is always there. I can see myself becoming friends with at least one of the escorts that I'm currently seeing.

[Guest Joey Ciccone]

>....some of the true benefits of being the john rather than the trick are:

>You're not the one waiting for the phone to ring, you get to make

>the choice of who you want to spend your time with, the escort is expected

>to give you a good time rather than the other way around, the relationship is

>usually at your convenience rather than theirs........

 

Thank you for providing those glimpses into a day in the life of an escort. Your insights illustrate just how harrowing it can be. Sure, during the date it's all fun and good humour, even more so when you're with an actual friend, but between gigs it's very much as you described above. Some clients are sensitive to these things, but most are not. I think it takes someone outgoing and resilient, someone open, someone who can make friends quickly and mean it to be able to deal with so many different midnight voices and motel faces. Someone trusting and in a general good mood. The kind of person another could easily befriend.

 

>The escort would almost certainly be someone who is able to

>look beyond the physical body into the person, and would

>be much more likely to see something that they find

>attractive in the sense that they want to know more,

>rather than the client who chose the escort based on

>looks in the first place.

 

More great insights. And making the transition from fantasy to friend is sometimes a grueling metamorphosis, although not as visceral as it sounds. But it takes two to make it occur, as is the case when a client also evolves into a true friend. Everyone's guard has to come down at some point. Long enough for trust and faith to enter, fostering admiration and respect, which nurture friendship.

 

Again, you make some very good points. jc

[Guest JasenRhodes]

Yeah, yeah, this is usually true, but my roommate - a big muscle boy escort - fell in love with a client and they've been going out for a year and a half now. The boyfriend is cute, but he's just a skinny boy and not all that fabulous looking. (And no, he's NOT still paying for everything and all that. They are truly in love.)

 

So anyway, just wanted to respond to that part.

 

 

[Guest allansmith63]

To have stepped very tentatively into this world as I did last spring, and to have found a wonderful, caring, supportive friend (who happens to be an escort) has been an incredible experience for me.

 

Thank you, Matt.

 

Allan.

 

ps It's your turn to buy dinner. :-)

[+ deej]

allansmith, if it's the Matt I know, you truly were lucky. He's a sweetheart.

[+ deej]

>I might also be in

>need of a, um, *favor*,

>sometime soon.......

 

I'm *so* giving in that regard.... ;-)

 

When we meet babe, it's just us the first time. After that, let the cameras roll.

[Guest allansmith63]

Hi Deej

 

...if it's the same Matt, it's not "were lucky", it's "am lucky"!!

 

Allan(who's lucky to call Matt his friend) :-)

[Guest alanm]

Justice, I am glad you responded. After I wrote my message I did

realize that there had to be more to the story. By the way, escorts are really not exactly the same as dentists or doctors

(this is in response to other comments, not necessarily your comments). Sex is an intimate experience, even when you are paying for it. Anyway, sorry about the self respect comment.

It is clear that you do have a lot of sefl respect!

[Traveller]

Well, responding to the initial question (there was far too much in between for my little brain to process after 28 hours of flying), I know that Canadian Matty would come to my rescue if I requested and we haven't even done the nasty yet. Several other escorts would and have (without remuneration even); and hard to believe, we hang out sometimes.

 

Later.

 

PS. Hagan, just got back from hiking the "W" in Torres del Paine and scuba diving in Easter Island. Big fun.

[Matt_Vancouver]

Oh my god you guys are too fucking seet for words! *blush* thanx

Matty(I'm starting to like being called that)

http://go.to/mattsplace

matt_escort@yahoo.com

[Guest dandday]

I have tried to stay out of this and off the board lately, but must put in my 2 cents worth here.

 

Can escorts and clients be friends? All the experience I have on this subject is what I have seen from my partner who was an escort in Portland from the time he was 18 until the day we met.

 

Easily 30% of our large group of friends are his former clients and other ex-escorts he helped when they were just entering the business. In our business, our accountant, attorney, advertising rep., banker, and real estate agent ALL are his former clients whom he had quit charging years prior to meeting me.

 

Every former client of his I have met loves him and would do anything in the world for him, and he has come to the rescue of severals when in need.

 

At first I was inteminidated by all these men. THAT WAS BEFORE I UNDERSOOD WHAT KIND OF MAN I HAD. His clients ment much more to him than just money. He CARED FOR and liked these men. They all accepted me from the beginning, steped back, wished us luck, and became my friends too.

 

The escorts we know in Portland and Seattle, both active and retired, are the same as my partner. They all have developed strong cherished friendships with former clients. I will not believe this is that rare, as the FEW escorts we have heard from on this thread support this.

[Guest shadow]

wow,

 

why is this topic so hot that it gets 41 replies?

 

Well, 42, if you count my reply.

 

What is the key to getting so many replies?

[Justice]

LAST EDITED ON Feb-07-01 AT 07:04PM (EST)[p]>The escorts we know in Portland

>and Seattle, both active and

>retired, are the same as

>my partner. They all have

>developed strong cherished friendships with

>former clients. I will not

>believe this is that rare,

>as the FEW escorts we

>have heard from on this

>thread support this.

 

On June 1st, I'll be working at the same job for over 20 years. During that time, I've developed close friendships with several current and former colleagues. We eat lunch together. We go to the theater and out to dinner. We go hiking and to concerts and to sporting events. We've attended several weddings and several "milestone" birthday parties. We've been guests in each others homes. We've celebrated the birth of children, mourned the loss of loved ones, and do everything that good friends are supposed to do for one another. Several people -- who still work with us -- have drifted away from the group and we've lost touch with more than a few former colleagues. (In some case several years after we stopped working together.)

 

A full time escort has to see an average of 5 clients a week in order to make enough money to pay his bills. They'll only see most of these clients once or twice. Other clients will become "regulars" who see their favorite escort whenever their mutual schedules and the client's budget allows. Is in possible for some of these regular relationships to turn into friendships? Absolutely! (There has to be something other than great sex }> that keeps causes the client to return again and again.) However, escorts are entitled to have private lives and I'm sure that there's more than a few escorts who've made a conscious decision to keep their private lives separate from their professional ones, and quite frankly, there's nothing wrong with that.

[Guest Shooter]

Because it is a double-edged sword. It not only questions the emotional stability and the perceptions of clients but also the integrity and motivations of escorts.

 

It implies that clients who find friends in escorts are desperate, deluded, and naive and it implies that all escorts are shallow, money grubbing, and deceptive.

 

Hence the nerve is struck compelling the masses to a myriad of responses defending their own perspective. None are, by the way, more eloquent than Mr. Ciccone's flawless rebuttal countering each point of the original argument. (TY did pretty well, too!)

 

Shooter :-)

[Guest EvilSwine]

Wow...Joey Ciccone had such a nice post. There ARE assholes in every walk of life. You may even have a relative that's an asshole- borrowing money or other things and never paying you back or returning them. If you have someone you only contact for a fuck or suck and then expect them to be your friend, then wise up. If someone emails you or talks to you or visits you only when they WANT something, then they aren't your friend. If you have them doing these things with no desire to do anything other than to visit with you to talk about something other than money or when you're going to be in town to pay for your next blowjob, then it's something a little more than a business relationship.

 

Some of the working guys who post on here and their clients seem to have developed relationships like that, where they can keep business and non-business separate. These escorts also seem to be the more professional ones who do a good job to begin with and treat their business like a business.