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Var. on New to escorting and terrified


Guest Angus1214
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Guest Angus1214

That's a very important discussion to bring up in this forum, and there have been some excellent responses to the question of initial fear of hiring an escort. I have just "taken the plunge" recently and did everything right, hiring a highly reviewed escort who lived up to his notices and my expectations 150%. However, I just could not seem to relax for our entire overnight, which made the experience less fulfilling than it might have been. My question is, does it take time (and several escort experiences) after years of "closethood" to fully accept the reality of gay sex?

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Guest Starbuck

I think you should meet a few escorts on an hourly basis first and perhaps do an overnight with an escort you have previously met. Sleeping and living together even for a short term raise issues of compatibility that you don't encounter in an hour.

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Guest allansmith63

Hi Angus#.

Good question you pose here. If your escort experience was your first time experiencing gay sex, then in all likelihood, I don't think you would have been able to be comfortable, particularly after years of "closethood". You would have the baggage of many years of society saying that homosexuality is wrong in many different ways. Your lack of comfort may have been feelings of guilt or shame. If it wasn't your first gay sex, the chemistry between you and the escort may have been off.

 

I spent 1 1/2 years seeking out brief gay moments at arcades & bathhouses. I hired an escort because I was tired of the furtiveness and the guilt and shame (and risk) of having sex with men whose names I seldom knew. I was very nervous ahead of time, because, like you, I'd booked an overnight - I mean, I was going to have to be naked in front of this guy! and sleep with him - could I trust him, etc. - all those "lack of comfort questions". Anyhow, I met him, spent a few minutes talking and all my fears and lack of comfort with the situation evaporated.

 

You will get to the point where you can be, and will be very comfortable with an escort.

 

Allan

 

ps for overnights, when booking an escort, ask if he snores :-)

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A couple of shots of Cuervo, half an E and a small rail and you should be fine. And remember, practice, practice, practice. Keep hiring a different escort nightly until you can do a triple gainer onto a 9 inch dick, and stick the landing with a smile on your face. You'll be a much better person for it.

 

Later.

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Good sex does not come to us by instinct. Remember that the heterosexual guys often have horror stories about what nerves made them do when they were in high school, or, for some, college, and were trying to get laid for the first time. As has been said, you are not only in the position of a teenager, but it is further complicated by whatever homophobia you have internalized, and we all seem to take in at least a little. Just because you have bought an e-ticket to get you past the trying to find a willing partner part of the experience doesn't mean that you are going to be spared the rest of the follies that make us human. Tell your internal parent to let up on you for not acting as old as you are chronologically. In terms of sex, you're a teenager.

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They're right. Take small steps (daytime, hour-long appointments) before trying to walk across the country (overnights, weekends). It may take a long time before you begin to feel comfortable. Your nervousness is not your fault, and it's not the escort's, either. The main thing to remember is that it will go away. Rome wasn't built in a day, practice makes perfect, and all that.

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Guest regulation

It is different for each person. But whatever you decide to do, don't be foolish enough to try to get rid of your inhibitions by using drugs or alcohol. A good rule of thumb: if you can't do something without drugging yourself first, don't do it.

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For me,and I am no spring chicken, it took a couple of glasses of wine and about two hours of picking up the phone and putting it down again before I took the initial plunge.(And maybe two months of just thinking about it before that!) I knew absolutely nothing about sex with men except that I wanted it. (How I wish I had known about this incredible site!) I lucked out with my first choice, and have both enriched and complicated my life. I do believe hour(ish) meetings are better when you are relatively new to this, and when you find an escort who makes you feel glad you chose him, then go for whatever time frame you like, but be sure you enjoy talking to him too...it's unlikely an overnight...even an evening..will be fulfilling if all you have is the sex. I would also strongly suggest a guy in his 30s for the first time...that could mean anyone saying he's 25 and up..almost everyone (escorts and even some clients) fudge on their age!)The young guys are beautiful but nothing beats having your first sexual experience with someone who knows exactly what they are doing!When you're comfortable with it, then go for some of the young guys. That was what I did, but I still find my most completely satisfying times are with guys in their 30s. There's something special about 30s men...they still have those terrific youthful bodies and tons of sex appeal, but also the maturity and good sense that comes with having survived your 20s! Overnights hold little appeal for me, but judging from the posts on this site, I'm in the minority. On the other hand, clock watching escorts are seldom rehired. The very best of these guys are highly adept at putting one at ease, and I envy anyone just starting the experience now, and having the benefit of M4M ESCORT reviews, not to mention the message center. Many of the escorts reviewed on here sound like they would be incredibly good first time experiences. (Were I young enough and rich enough, I think my next goal would be to sample almost all of them. Ah, the stuff of dreams!)

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Guest Angus1214

A week has gone by since my first "escort experience" and I'm feeling much better about the whole thing. In fact, I have made another date with the same escort for later in the month to further explore this wild and crazy drive known as gay sex! I appreciate all the good advice everyone has posted here.....thanks. Unfortunately, I've broken most of them by doing and planning overnites with a pretty young (but experienced) and beautiful guy.

 

Now, I just have to keep repeating to myself the mantra "Hiring an escort is IN ADDITION TO and not IN PLACE OF my regular life".

 

I'd love to trade e-mail with anyone(esp. married, closet cases)who is going through or been through this "honeymoon" phase with escorts. Write me at the screen name above at ao-hell.

 

Joke:How can you find a gay man in Montana? Just look for the wife and kids!

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Tampa Yankee:

 

I take it that means a line of cocaine or crystal meth or other illicit chemical "entertainment" of one's choice--inhaled OR injected.

 

Not something I would care to recommend.

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