Exchange of professional services

[+ WstVlgChris]

Escorts, how open are you to barter arrangements? 

In the spring, I hired an escort who was very personable and we had a good conversation amid a very good session. It turned out he wanted my advice about the creative field in which I work and soon after the session I spent a couple of hours (3 at most) looking at his work and giving some advice. 

There was a miscommunication at that time--he didn't understand the etiquette of asking for a freebie. Although he later apologized (after he reached out to me asking whether I wanted to book another session, and I pointed out how he had failed), it affected me enough that I didn't feel quite right about hiring him again. Not that I have any animosity toward him. 

Now he's gotten back in touch, asking me to look at his creative efforts more in depth.  

I have the time to do this (and this is what I do for a living, albeit at a far lower hourly rate than the $300/hr he charges). And while we need to talk about the parameters of what level of feedback he wants and/or needs, I'm inclined to do it, to accept this gig.

I'm wondering whether I should bill him at my standard rate and leave it at that. Or should I suggest a barter arrangement?

Is bartering with an escort--your professional services in exchange for mine--okay, or is it somewhat creepy and exploitative?  If I were to present this option, I would do so respectfully and I  would certainly make clear that he could pay me in cash if he prefers.  

(To put it in perspective: At this point, it's hard to project how much work is involved for me, but at the very least it would be the equivalent of a 2 hour session for him, and it could possibly be as much as an overnight.)

If any providers have insight here, I would appreciate it.

[Jamie21]

Talk about it with him and price it at your normal rate less a bit given the nature of the barter. I’ve done professional exchange for services in the past; I did a massage for a photographer who took some professional shots for me. It worked well. The worst that could happen is he says no. 

[Rod Hagen]

I've exchanged with photographers. It's fine.  Do be clear which sessions are a compensation and which are paid, also try not to be rigid about your time vs. his, that's how the relationship can sour.

In the late '90s there was an artist in the southwest who'd offer to fly escorts to him for a few days in exchange for some money and one of his paintings.  He was a respected artist, but I did not care for his art (southwest) at all.  I declined.  A friend of mine, took him up on it and he still has the painting.

[Rudynate]

A few years ago, a provider proposed an exchange of services.  He was a very popular, very desirable guy, so I was initially excited, but quickly I realized it would be an enormous ethical violation and I told him I couldn't do it, but we could do a conventional fee-for-services exchange.  He agreed.   But then suddenly, things changed.  The interaction had been very friendly and he suddenly became extremely demanding and started acting as though I was the enemy, so it fell apart.

[Jamie21]

On 11/22/2021 at 6:58 PM, Rod Hagen said:

I've exchanged with photographers. It's fine.  Do be clear which sessions are a compensation and which are paid, also try not to be rigid about your time vs. his, that's how the relationship can sour.

In the late '90s there was an artist in the southwest who'd offer to fly escorts to him for a few days in exchange for some money and one of his paintings.  He was a respected artist, but I did not care for his art (southwest) at all.  I declined.  A friend of mine, took him up on it and he still has the painting.

And one day the painting will be worth millions…

[NJF]

4 hours ago, Jamie21 said:

And one day the painting will be worth millions…

Or ended up in a landfill 

[marylander1940]

On 11/22/2021 at 9:08 AM, WstVlgChris said:

 

Escorts, how open are you to barter arrangements? 

In the spring, I hired an escort who was very personable and we had a good conversation amid a very good session. It turned out he wanted my advice about the creative field in which I work and soon after the session I spent a couple of hours (3 at most) looking at his work and giving some advice. 

There was a miscommunication at that time--he didn't understand the etiquette of asking for a freebie. Although he later apologized (after he reached out to me asking whether I wanted to book another session, and I pointed out how he had failed), it affected me enough that I didn't feel quite right about hiring him again. Not that I have any animosity toward him. 

Now he's gotten back in touch, asking me to look at his creative efforts more in depth.  

I have the time to do this (and this is what I do for a living, albeit at a far lower hourly rate than the $300/hr he charges). And while we need to talk about the parameters of what level of feedback he wants and/or needs, I'm inclined to do it, to accept this gig.

I'm wondering whether I should bill him at my standard rate and leave it at that. Or should I suggest a barter arrangement?

Is bartering with an escort--your professional services in exchange for mine--okay, or is it somewhat creepy and exploitative?  If I were to present this option, I would do so respectfully and I  would certainly make clear that he could pay me in cash if he prefers.  

(To put it in perspective: At this point, it's hard to project how much work is involved for me, but at the very least it would be the equivalent of a 2 hour session for him, and it could possibly be as much as an overnight.)

If any providers have insight here, I would appreciate it.

you could have walked away or ask him to leave right away but you kept talking with him for 2 extra hours. 

Maybe you could talk to him directly and cut a deal with him. Btw one thing is giving advice and other things is actually representing someone I guess you're willing to do the first but possibly not the later. 

 

[marylander1940]

On 11/22/2021 at 1:58 PM, Rod Hagen said:

I've exchanged with photographers. It's fine.  Do be clear which sessions are a compensation and which are paid, also try not to be rigid about your time vs. his, that's how the relationship can sour.

In the late '90s there was an artist in the southwest who'd offer to fly escorts to him for a few days in exchange for some money and one of his paintings.  He was a respected artist, but I did not care for his art (southwest) at all.  I declined.  A friend of mine, took him up on it and he still has the painting.

considering how few guys escorted back before internet was widespread, I'm sure the painting got a great deal at the moment. 

 

On 11/24/2021 at 12:07 PM, Jamie21 said:

And one day the painting will be worth millions…

Would you have taken the deal? 

Now at least we can google and find out an estimate of how much X is worth but back then was very difficult. 

I wonder how many escorts would be interested if the painting was about them, obviously it might take longer than just a few days to do it. 

On 11/24/2021 at 4:28 PM, NJF said:

Or ended up in a landfill 

or after the painter is gone: 

Edited November 27, 2021 by marylander1940

[+ WilliamM]

8 hours ago, marylander1940 said:

considering how few guys escorted back before internet was widespread, I'm sure the painting got a great deal at the moment. 

 

Would you have taken the deal? 

Now at least we can google and find out an estimate of how much X is worth but back then was very difficult. 

I wonder how many escorts would be interested if the painting was about them, obviously it might take longer than just a few days to do it. 

or after the painter is gone: 

Why do you think few guys escorted before the Internet?  Providers and escort agencies advertised in newspapers like the. Village Voice.

And of course gay newspapers in cities like Los Angeles, Boston and Philadelphia.