Threatening situation and consequences

[Rand]

Hey y’all. 
So I’m asking providers and everyone else. 
Yesterday I had absolutely terrifying experience with one of the providers and wanted your opinion on how to resolve this situation or what to do, or maybe just put it all behind me. 
 

We chatted nicely for some time and he sounded like a nice sweet guy. Exchanged some pics in the messages and both were excited. I decided to take a chance and meet at his place. After spending almost an hour to get there, he opened the door. He was standing behind it and I walked in (why I did it explain later). I saw a guy with about 15-20lb extra (old pics 🤦🏻‍♂️), candy wraps, trash and cigarette buds everywhere on the floor, stained walls and sheets. He was holding a cigarette in the hand and immediately closed the door. It smelled horrible in there. Within a minute I decided to leave that hole but he just locked and blocked the door and started being agitated. I tried to move him away from the door but he said “You don’t want to fight me”. My first thought was “I’m gonna fucking die in this hole”. I said I don’t feel save and want to leave right now. When he asked why, I just pointed him at all that mess and said I can’t be here anymore. He was looking high or on something and started saying that he spent time on “cleaning his place and waiting for me” so I suppose to pay him anyway. I said that I spent 2 minutes (would be seconds if I had access to the door) in his place and not gonna pay $300 for that. After some arguing and trying to calm him down I said I’ll pay him $50 for “his time”, sent him money and ran out of that apartment. Can’t find words to describe how awful I felt on so many levels! He was texting me afterwards that he has a big dick and asking why I left. My first impulse was to explain why and what, but I decided to just ignore all that. Didn’t see the reason to explain obvious things and waste anymore time on that person. Big dick doesn’t mean you can be a dick and people will suck it willingly in this shithole. Maybe some that are desperate will but I’m not amongst them!

 I’m sharing this a day later because I wanted to my emotions so set and relax. 
 

Now about why I entered apartment without looking at him carefully in the first place. He does look like on pictures. I didn’t notice that pics were outdated right away. He has a lot of good reviews on Rentmen with only couple of them negative quite some time ago. And he actually a member of this forum.

I’m not posting his name because I don’t know what to do with this situation. At least not decided should I leave a terrible review or just leave it all behind. 
 

Have you been in that kind of situation? What did you do?

Peace to everyone ✌️

[Jamie21]

It sounds like you did the right thing by leaving. He’s not professional or respectful if he sees clients in that state. I guess when you chatted to him he wasn’t high but when you turned up he was. That’s no state to provide a good service. You probably shouldn’t have paid him anything but I understand in the situation you had to get out. Put it down to experience and maybe do a bit more due diligence on your chosen provider (although I’m not sure what else you could have done in that situation). 
I’m tempted to say you should provide a review on here or Rentmen but perhaps contact him with your complaints and see what he says before posting a review. Give him the opportunity to explain how he was in that state and the opportunity to apologise. 

 

[Luv2play]

This is a very disturbing scene you have described. I think you did the best to preserve your safety in the circumstances. I agree with the opinion to write it up to experience. 

I would post a review on RM since you did pay him. Many of us read those reviews. 

I recently backed out of a session I had arranged with a provider based on a bad review on RM which he had had RM remove. I asked him about it on RMChat and wasn't convinced by his reply. A week later, he got another bad review (this was after our originally scheduled date) and the reviewer cited drug use. In Canada we get to read the comments on RM. I felt relieved I had made the right decision.

[Storm4U]

He sounds like a nightmare and the way you describe him sounds like he is a drug user. This may be a polarizing thing to say, but I just think that there is a greater likelihood of trouble with  clients or providers who are drug users. My recommendation would be to leave a review to help spare someone else the trouble. I have never been in a situation where I felt like I was in danger from a client, but I'm always cautious and on guard.

[lonely_john]

2 hours ago, Rand said:

He has a lot of good reviews on Rentmen with only couple of them negative quite some time ago. And he actually a member of this forum.

How recent was his latest review?

[Luv2play]

Disappointing to hear he is a member of this forum.

[Rand]

3 hours ago, Jamie21 said:

It sounds like you did the right thing by leaving. He’s not professional or respectful if he sees clients in that state. I guess when you chatted to him he wasn’t high but when you turned up he was. That’s no state to provide a good service. You probably shouldn’t have paid him anything but I understand in the situation you had to get out. Put it down to experience and maybe do a bit more due diligence on your chosen provider (although I’m not sure what else you could have done in that situation). 
I’m tempted to say you should provide a review on here or Rentmen but perhaps contact him with your complaints and see what he says before posting a review. Give him the opportunity to explain how he was in that state and the opportunity to apologise. 

 

The thing is that I was so disgusted and stressed that I don’t want to talk to him anymore. Ever. 

[Rand]

1 hour ago, Storm4U said:

He sounds like a nightmare and the way you describe him sounds like he is a drug user. This may be a polarizing thing to say, but I just think that there is a greater likelihood of trouble with  clients or providers who are drug users. My recommendation would be to leave a review to help spare someone else the trouble. I have never been in a situation where I felt like I was in danger from a client, but I'm always cautious and on guard.

Maybe he felt anxious and smoke something. At the end of the day I don’t care. I don’t do drugs nor I support anyone who does. Next time I’ll be more vigilant. 

Edited November 19, 2021 by Rand

[Rand]

1 hour ago, lonely_john said:

How recent was his latest review?

June 15 2021. Positive. 

[lonely_john]

31 minutes ago, Rand said:

Maybe he felt anxious and smoke something. At the end of the day I don’t care. I don’t do drugs nor I support anyone who does. Next time I’ll be more vigilant. 

I use 420 myself so I don't mind if a provider does 420 and is still functional and can perform. And I can actually confirm that most providers perform better when they use 420. It's usually the hard drugs the ones that mess with people's lives so then you start seeing run down apartments among other signs. If you use the search feature of the forum using the keyword "Signs of PNP" you will find some threads that mention the signs to look for in a provider's profile to determine if he's using or abusing even if he doesn't include PNP in his intos.

[lonely_john]

37 minutes ago, Rand said:

June 15 2021. Positive. 

Months without a positive review on a currently active profile is not a good sign. That could have been a first red flag.

Edited November 19, 2021 by lonely_john

[+ tassojunior]

I've found a 5 "positive" review with warning in the actual wording is more likely to stay on RM.

[Rand]

1 hour ago, lonely_john said:

I use 420 myself so I don't mind if a provider does 420 and is still functional and can perform. And I can actually confirm that most providers perform better when they use 420. It's usually the hard drugs the ones that mess with people's lives so then you start seeing run down apartments among other signs. If you use the search feature of the forum using the keyword "Signs of PNP" you will find some threads that mention the signs to look for in a provider's profile to determine if he's using or abusing even if he doesn't include PNP in his intos.

I don’t mind 420 either. Don’t smoke but don’t mind others. I’m not suggesting that he was on something hard. Either way it should be consensual and announced. 

[+ sam.fitzpatrick]

If a provider is asking you into his home/place of business, you should not have to ask if the place is clean and free of smoke/pot/pet odors.  If upon arrival, you discover that not to be the case, that alone is reason to terminate the session before it starts.  

As for leaving a review - I would.

 

[Lohengrin1979]

I am so sorry you went through this. I’ve had a similar situation happen with one provider and I pretty much resolved it the same way. It’s a horrible feeling to feel unsafe in strange, dirty surroundings.

I am also disturbed by the fact that he is a forum member here and is somehow quasi-shielded by that. Were I you I would absolutely call him out on here and on RM. Let him explain himself. You do future clients of his a disservice by not warning them of the possibility of ending up in that same, unsafe situation.

[Rand]

23 hours ago, Lohengrin1979 said:

I am so sorry you went through this. I’ve had a similar situation happen with one provider and I pretty much resolved it the same way. It’s a horrible feeling to feel unsafe in strange, dirty surroundings.

I am also disturbed by the fact that he is a forum member here and is somehow quasi-shielded by that. Were I you I would absolutely call him out on here and on RM. Let him explain himself. You do future clients of his a disservice by not warning them of the possibility of ending up in that same, unsafe situation.

 

On 11/21/2021 at 3:33 PM, TylerGrovesNYC said:

If the provider is a member of this forum, I understand your being apprehensive about straight up outing him & putting his RM profile name on blast right on here.

The bigger problem however is that something needs to be done about warning people about this behavior OFF of RentMen. RentMen is not exactly always reliable in terms of unbiased feedback, there are ways of getting bad reviews removed. 

I could understand you wanting to leave because the place was gross, but the real messed up thing is that your exit was blocked and you were held hostage without your consent. He should have just said, "hey OK, I get it, this doesn't work for you, it is what it is, doors right there".

You probably are reluctant to start more confrontation but perhaps you could post this same story under a throwaway account on here so that there is reliable information that won't get deleted?

Keep in mind...I'm not the "provider police" and I'm just going based on your word if it's true...it hurts all the other providers when this behavior goes unchecked.

To be fair. He could always just make a new RM account & reform his behavior if your negative feedback really puts him in the gutter. 

 

On 11/19/2021 at 12:13 AM, marylander1940 said:

Report him to RM and give him a bad review if he hasn't block you by now. 

 

 

On 11/18/2021 at 11:59 PM, sam.fitzpatrick said:

If a provider is asking you into his home/place of business, you should not have to ask if the place is clean and free of smoke/pot/pet odors.  If upon arrival, you discover that not to be the case, that alone is reason to terminate the session before it starts.  

As for lealving a review - I would.

 

I left a bad review and also reported him to RM admin 👩‍💼 exactly the same way I did here. Plus provided screenshots of the nasty messages he sent me afterwards. Dozens of them. Hopefully it will take some effects. Blocked him on RM as well. What a nightmare!

[+ Tygerscent]

He blocked your exit and insisted you stay against your will and then harassed you after the appointment with texts/emails~? 😳😳😳 No~! No~! …and NO~!

 You never want to be a baby sitter, feel unsafe, be unsafe, feel threatened or bullied/harassed/stalked… 

 Generally a good idea to stay in somewhat constant communication with your potential hire or Client before meeting and up to day of… if you start getting texts that are incoherent, unintelligible, feel threatening, text back explaining your confusion and discomfort and then use the block feature when appropriate~ 

 Glad to hear that you were able to negotiate your way out but, so sad, (on so many levels), to hear stories like this~ 

Edited November 23, 2021 by Tygerscent

[Deadlift1]

Should of brought a taser.  When he said "you don't want to fight me," you reply "ur right" and tased him.  Only in a state where tasers are legal please 

[coriolis888]

4 hours ago, Rand said:

 

 

 

I left a bad review and also reported him to RM admin 👩‍💼 exactly the same way I did here. Plus provided screenshots of the nasty messages he sent me afterwards. Dozens of them. Hopefully it will take some effects. Blocked him on RM as well. What a nightmare!

Terrible situation. 

Would you be willing to say which city this person is located?

I certainly would not want to have an experience like you had.  

[Rand]

7 hours ago, coriolis888 said:

Terrible situation. 

Would you be willing to say which city this person is located?

I certainly would not want to have an experience like you had.  

NYC

[TylerGrovesNYC]

16 hours ago, Rand said:

 

 

 

I left a bad review and also reported him to RM admin 👩‍💼 exactly the same way I did here. Plus provided screenshots of the nasty messages he sent me afterwards. Dozens of them. Hopefully it will take some effects. Blocked him on RM as well. What a nightmare!

Look man. You did what you had to do.

Nobody wants to be a tattle tale; nobody wants to be that "snitch" or be accused of being the one who slandered. When it comes to this you HAD to. It's super easy to say, "man if that was me I'd have knocked his ass out and triumphed back down the stairs". It's easy to tell you that as someone whose just hearing the story, and make you feel small for reporting him. Fact is: most folks wouldn't do as they say they would.

"High school" machismo cannot last forever; it's unsustainable and those who choose to take that road end up with felonies, records, huge fines, and several years taken off their freedom.

Compared to the world of straight escorting, gay escorts have gotten away with murder for way too long. I'm glad there's a place like this that can help enforce some standards.

[BaronArtz]

To the OP

- I am sorry it happened to you

- Your thread is entirely meaningless unless if you disclose, in any format of your choice, who the a-hole is.

[Rand]

18 hours ago, BaronArtz said:

To the OP

- I am sorry it happened to you

- Your thread is entirely meaningless unless if you disclose, in any format of your choice, who the a-hole is.

I’m thinking about it. 
 

[coriolis888]

7 minutes ago, Rand said:

I’m thinking about it. 
 

Think of how many clients you would save from a similar horror if they were to hire that awful person.   

[harlow]

31 minutes ago, coriolis888 said:

Think of how many clients you would save from a similar horror if they were to hire that awful person.   

I agree. Once someone physically prevented you from leaving that turned into way more than just a bad experience. This is a safety issue.