Another bad review.

[Guest MrB]

RE: Negative Reviews and how site works

 

I try not to think of reviews as either negative or positive. All reviews should be factual, and if they can't be, honest at least. If you get together with a great escort and he's not all he's hyped up to be, I believe it's OK to say so in your review. But you stick to the facts. Personally, I've never needed to give any guy a 'negative' or 'not recommended' rating, but I find the 'unsatisfactory-satisfactory-recommended' distinction very useful.

If we only publish good news and allow no shades of grey, we don't have a review site any more. But a review that is vindictive or sounds dishonest has zero credibility in my eyes. It's just a client making a fool of himself. It would be an outrage if the escort was not allowed to set the record straight.

[Guest regulation]

RE: Negative Reviews and how site works

 

>I

>am appalled when I read

>that some people take more

>pleasure in reading the negative

>reviews than the positive.

>When I hire an escort,

>I look for the guys

>with the positive reviews.

>I really could care less

>about the negative ones.

>Why would I go to

>a movie or play that

>has nothing but negative reviews?

> The same goes with

>escorts.

>

>So you guys that dwell on

>the negatives, go ahead and

>do your thing, but I

>think this site will thrive

>more when all the good

>guys show up for the

>dance.

>

 

I don't recall seeing any post in this thread stating that the poster enjoys reading negative reviews. What some posters here have said is that they find negative reviews more useful than positive ones because (i) negative reviews are often more detailed and factual and (ii) they've found that escorts reviewed positively don't always perform well on other occasions. I agree with both points. I've tried escorts who were reviewed positively here, only to discover that in some cases their merits were much exaggerated. I also agree that negative reviews are often more detailed and informative. They're valuable because they tell us whom to avoid.

 

I've posted one negative review about an escort who made an arrangement with me and then refused to honor it. I wish someone else had posted a negative review of him before I did. If I'd had the benefit of such a review, I wouldn't have wasted my time and money on him. I hope the review I posted helps someone else in that way.

 

If you read a lot of the positive reviews you see that reviewer after reviewer says that most of the escorts he's seen have been less than satisfactory. Even those who post positive reviews complain that other escorts they've seen have problems keeping appointments, carrying on a conversation, etc. That matches my experience -- most escorts simply aren't very good at what they do. Some of us have busy lives and have little time for this sort of thing. We don't want to waste the few opportunities we do have on duds. I don't hire people who've had a negative review here, whatever response the escort may have made to such a review. The quality of most escorts out there is such that the review is more likely than not to be accurate. I realize some negative reviews may be posted from other than the best motives, though I find it hard to understand that. But in this area I'm on the side of the consumers, and that isn't going to change.

[Guest Jake]

RE: Negative Reviews and how site works

 

LAST EDITED ON Sep-04-00 AT 09:51AM (EST)[p]I guess I pretty much agree with HooBoy on this subject ... which is not just ass-kissing on my part, because I've disagreed with him as often as I've agreed. But I've learned in my less-than-a-year hiring of escorts that not every experience is going to be heaven. If it's not it doesn't mean I have to report it for the world to see. The first time it happened, I felt obliged to write about it in a review. Turns out that my escort posted a nice reply, agreeing with my assessment of the situation and offering to make it up to me. I felt bad about writing that review instead of just discussing it with the escort. I also think that an escort's reply says so much about him. I have learned to stay away from some guys just because of the nature of their responses to a negative review.

 

Now the "bad guys" are a different story and I think that it's their exposure that was the source of pleasure gained in reading the bad reviews. We can't all be as open as some in our lives and our predilections. A scam artist knows this and banks on our being silent prey to their hustling techniques. There is much pleasure to be had in seeing them exposed over and over again until they are forced into "early retirement." While I have had many great experiences because of the positive reviews, This site's greatest value to me has been to steer me away from the assholes. I'm sure my libido would have led me to many of them if it weren't for the insight gained here.

 

BTW, I just returned from my first trip to Montreal. Everything that has been said is so, so, so true! I can't wait to go back. There are fabulously sexy guys at all the stripper bars in Montreal ... not just Campus ... not to mention the "free" numbers to be found just strutting down St. Catherine. I wish I had paid more attention in my French classes! C'est la vie.

[Guest dandday]

TO HOOBOY

 

I did not write this thread as a personal attack on the the way you run your business. It is your business and I would no more try to tell you how to run it as I'm sure you would not try to tell me how to run my hotels.

 

I was simply outraged over the way I saw a few escorts "trash" a client who had written a bad review. Your site provides a great service, plus CAN be most entertaining at times. I have gained valuable insight into a lifestyle far removed from my own. In fact your site has helped strengthen my relationship with my partner, an ex-escort, as I now understand many things about him that I would have had no insight into other than thru this site.

[HooBoy]

RE: TO HOOBOY

 

>I did not write this thread

>as a personal attack on

>the the way you run

>your business.

 

I did not take it that way.

 

I appreciate all input and sometimes I feel compelled to explain why I do things so there is a better understanding of the method behind the madness and more importantly maintain open lines of communication.

 

Other times, I just hit DELETE. That's when you don't hear from me! :-)

 

HooBoy

Email: HooBoy@male4malescorts.com

[Guest N]

RE: How refreshing it would be..........

 

By all means, negative reviews

>need to be posted, but

>if a guy has 7

>great reviews and 1 negative,

>I think it's fairly evident

>it was a bad day,

>so why post it?

 

OK, let's say he is having a "bad day." Does that give him the permission to NOT service the client as agreed to and still receive payment as if they had? Something is not right or fair about that.

 

N

[Guest MrB]

RE: How refreshing it would be..........

 

You're right. It's really simple in my opinion. If we all post factual reviews of our experiences, good and not so good, the guys with more bad than good reviews are the only ones whose business would suffer. They're the ones that are untruthful or have attitude. Of course a really great guy can have an off day and get the occasional poor review but he'll have several positive ones to outweigh it.

If the weather report gave us sunshine only and never any rain, we wouldn't watch it anymore. Same applies to this site. :-)

[+ honcho]

Shades of Grey

 

I profusely thank HooBoy for establishing this site and agree it would be very valuable if the only $ervice it provided were to warn us of the complete scam-scum-take-your-money-and-run types.

 

On the other hand, (OTOH), here's an example of an experience I had with somebody, that had I known in advance how it was likely to turn out, I would not have engaged his company.

 

It was a *big* body builder who advertised in the local rag ( SF BAR ), who did flex and permit me to worship his body with my mouth, but was watching a soap opera on TV the whole time, and seemed to have "tuned me out" of his existence.

 

(Probably straight and no longer advertises, and it was 10 years ago in any case). While we might fuss about gradations of engagement, that he was watching TV the whole time was objective fact, and could have been verified by HooBoy, had the M4M ER been around then.

[Guest squaddie]

RE: Negative Reviews and how site works

 

I have been using escorts for many years and I wish this site was available for us many years ago.

 

I have so far submitted two reviews and as it happens one good the other not so good. The good one speaks for itself.

 

However, the other was given because I had asked for something specific (kissing) and was told it was ok. But it wasn't. When I tried I was told 'I don't do that'. Now when I ask someone if they kiss, am I wrong to assume it will be a proper deep kiss? A pec on the cheek or touching lips is not, IMHO, the definition of kissing re client and escort. Had the escort been honest, or at least defined what he meant by kissing, I could then have decided to go ahead regardless knowing that this would not be part of our encounter, or decided to give him a miss and seek elsewhere. He denied me that option.

 

In my review I praised the escort for what he did well, but said I wouldn't hire him again because he wasn't honest enough with me. I gave a balanced review and that if kissing wasn't important a prospective client wouldn't be put off, but if it was, then at least he would be aware of what I had said in my review.

 

The escort is free to send in a report and give his reasons why my review is, in his opinion, unfair. That is his perogative. That he might verbally attack me should not prevent me sending in my review.

[Guest N]

RE: TO HOOBOY

 

I am really having difficulty with this particular thread.

 

I don't understand what the problem is in understanding that if someone promises you one thing and delivers another - he has not done his job!

 

If enough people express this opinion "that he has not done his job," it lets others know that this escort does not do what he has said he would.

 

Why is everyone coming to the defense of the escort? What about support for the client?

 

I think it is time to stop finding excuses for lack of honesty and encourage everyone to "tell it like it is!"

 

We are, one presumes, fairly intellegent beings and have a pretty good idea when either a client or an escort is being vindictive. It does no one any good for us to "bash" each other over the issue. Why make it personal?

[Guest Mallard]

Thanks for your responses to my bad review on Kyle of Tampa. In his response, he stated that he would answer my messages, email, phone call, etc., to this date, HE HAS NOT. And thank you MiamiLooker, your right, Kyle never did deny the fact that he owes me money.

[Guest cleverock]

RE: "So personal"

 

There are a few good reasons. One is money----for most clients, escorts are not a cheap date. For escorts, a really scathing review represents potential for lost income. Either way, it's not hard to get pissed if there's a time or bad review.

 

I think it was John Preston who once said that men who use escorts had a lot of "relationship needs". It's probably too sweeping a generalization, but it describes the situation that a lot of guys probably feel, but don't necessarily acknowledge. My own observation is that escorts have these, too. They also need to stay in control and often have some histrionic qualities (i.e., liking to perform, deriving approbation from personal service, taking in all those compliments about their bods, etc.). If an escort doesn't fulfill the clinets needs, the really needy client will feel more than hurt---more like wounded and rejected. If the escort gets nailed in a review, they're hurt, they don't have control and no one is feeding their ego, so drama may be the way they cope.

 

And escorts aren't the only ones who can get controlling---a lot of clients figure they're better than the escorts they hire (yeah, right, the buyer is "virtuous") and feel superior as well as angry when things don't work.There was aguy on the ATKOL forum who was seriously like this. He had a major vendetta against Talvin DeMachio until he fund out that he hadn't rented Talvin after all! Talvin was the one who figured out the problem and made the overtures to make things right---what a mensch, esp. with a major league snob.

 

It's no wonder people have strong feelings about this, even discussing it in the abstract.

[Guest MikeConway]

I think most of us are smart enough to know why we have a review site for escorts. I hope it adds some accountabilty to the profression along with some respect for those of us who try to maintain a professional standard in the industry.

 

As someone who worked as a trainer in the service industry for a large company here in Toronto, we teach that "complaints" should be seen in a positive way. It is feedback that we would not get any other way, its a change to see if there is an area we have to improve on or not.

 

I think all feedback is good, its hard to see someone complain about you if they are not happy.

I had one case of that recently, none of us are perfect, even with my 11 glowing reviews I cant make everyone happy. One of the potential problems of having so many good reviews on the other hand is that you become almost "sainted" in the escort world with very high expectations.

 

Another reason on that line for a complaint is that the service didnt match or meet the expectation of the client, and that can happen. It doesnt mean the escort was bad, or the client was bad, simply certain expectations weren't met.

 

I hope though, that clients, who see us who try to do our best, would approach us at the time if there are any problems or concerns first.

 

But all and all I feel everyone should be free to express themselves. I just find everyone jumps to the message boards to stay anonymous and behind a mask and not deal with real interpersonal communications and speak directly to the individual involved to see if you can resolve your conflict.

 

There are definitely situations that should be posted and put up to warn others, but I think often we jump the gun abit.

 

Sorry my morning ramble.

 

Mike

[Guest Hanover]

Best to give the escort the last word, for reasons persuasively argued by Tampa Yankee (1 Sept). The escort who "trashes" a reviewer is only adding grist to the mill of the person he attacks. This summer I posted a moderately critical review. The response that it elicited, although far from scathing, revealed the escort to be an arrogant, sarcastic ass much more effectively than I did in my review. Who wants to spend time and money on someone like that? Someone who does deserves what he gets.

[Matt_Vancouver]

I totally agree with Mike here, regarding the sainthood status, I often say, " I hope I can live up to my reviews" only because they make me sound amazing, I am after all only human. I have my bad days, I have hangovers, I have sick days. I do my best but I often wonder, are the men I see expecting a totally unobtainable sense of nirvana? Oh god do I have a god complex or what: )

enough on that.

matt

http://go.to/mattsplace

matt_escort@yahoo.com

[Guest allansmith63]

LAST EDITED ON Sep-12-00 AT 12:35PM (EST)[p]Matt... even a bad day with you would be close to heaven...

 

Nah, nah, NG - I beat you to saying it. :-)

 

A.

[Guest Nice Guy]

Nah,Nah Allan,

I have seen a few "bad Days"... it's not heaven!

But you know, the temperature was fine, so couldn't have been the other place NG

[Guest allansmith63]

... and I thought that I had snuck this one in without you noticing, NG ... :-)

[Matt_Vancouver]

HEY!!!! enough of that!!

one day you guys are luvin me up all over the board, the next we're hearing about my PMS days: )

what up

matt

http://go.to/mattsplace

matt_escort@yahoo.com

[Guest allansmith63]

I am!! }>

 

A.