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Gman Doesn't Want To Brag Or Anything-But He Had A Date!!!??

Gar1eth

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Gar1eth Grand Master

+ Gar1eth

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Yes it's true!! I had a date!!! There's been a 3-1/2 month period of getting to know each other by text. But that's normal, right? ??

 

Actually what happened was the guy contacted me thru one of the hook-up apps, and left his phone number back on February. I contacted him by text. I think it took a day or so for him to respond. Then I responded back -and there was bubkes for a response until the early part of May. I probably did send an interim text in April because I really wanted to meet the guy. But again, he didn't respond until May. And even now he won't always respond to texts for three or more days. So it's frustrating. ??

 

When he did finally respond a week ago, he said he was under a deadline at work. But when it was finished, he wanted to meet. So we set up a day to meet earlier this week. That day he texts me that he's still too busy. But we managed to meet today for a bit. We went to a reopened coffee shop. We also managed to do a bit of necking in the parking lot.

 

He said he likes me. And he wants to meet again. I am worried about Corona-especially since I'm in a high risk group due to age and medical conditions. But I, as many of you are, am lonely. I don't even have any friends here to talk to. I think even though it scares me I'm going to have to go for it.

 

One thing I'd like to get some viewpoints on from our community here. This guy is bisexual. He says that with woman he has to be attracted to them physically. With men he has to be attracted to more to personality. For those of you who are bisexual or have dated bisexuals, I'm wondering if this is a common preference or idiosyncratic to this guy.

 

Gman

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Gar1eth Grand Master

+ Gar1eth

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But we managed to meet today for a bit. We went to a reopened coffee shop. We also managed to do a bit of necking in the parking lot.

 

Gman

Do you mean "necking" in the making out sense of the word? ;)

 

Aside from something involving vampires or hangmen's nooses is there any other type of necking? And just for the record my canines are of normal length and I don't know that many knots. ?

 

But what are people's experiences with bisexual guys? I'm a blue star (or is it gold star?) gay male. I've never been with a woman and never wanted to be - well I might have intellectually wanted-but never libidinally wanted.

 

 

Gman

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Don’t over think it. Caution and vigilance for signs of dishonesty or insincerity is appropriate early in any dating interaction. Otherwise, just enjoy the journey.

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rvwnsd Grand Master

rvwnsd

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Yes it's true!! I had a date!!! There's been a 3-1/2 month period of getting to know each other by text. But that's normal, right? ??...

That's wonderful! I am so happy for you. Good luck !

 

...One thing I'd like to get some viewpoints on from our community here. This guy is bisexual. He says that with woman he has to be attracted to them physically. With men he has to be attracted to more to personality. For those of you who are bisexual or have dated bisexuals, I'm wondering if this is a common preference or idiosyncratic to this guy.

 

Gman

Your question made me think long and hard about the bisexual men who were part of the men's coming out group I worked with. A coupe of the bisexual guys stated their attraction to women was strictly for sex and their attraction to men was for more than sex. Most of the guys started out in one of two places: 1) a struggle with having a physical attraction to women for the purpose of having sex and emotional/physical attraction to men for the purpose of having an emotional/physical relationship or 2) a struggle with having a physical attraction to men for the purpose of having sex and an emotional/physical attraction to women. What was most interesting was when a guy started out in place #2 and slowly realized he was in place #1.

 

Did that make sense?

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Gar1eth Grand Master

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Don’t over think it. Caution and vigilance for signs of dishonesty or insincerity is appropriate early in any dating interaction. Otherwise, just enjoy the journey.

 

Oh he's quite open about being polyamory. This is early days yet. He seems like a nice guy. What I'm hoping for is a friendship with benefits. And I think that's what he wants too.

 

 

That's wonderful! I am so happy for you!! Good luck

 

Thanks. Even if we don't turn out to be compatible sexually. He seems like a nice guy to have as a friend. But again we will have to see.

 

Your question made me think long and hard about the bisexual men who were part of the men's coming out group I worked with. A coupe of the bisexual guys stated their attraction to women was strictly for sex and their attraction to men was for more than sex. Most of the guys started out in one of two places: 1) a struggle with having a physical attraction to women for the purpose of having sex and emotional/physical attraction to men for the purpose of having an emotional/physical relationship or 2) a struggle with having a physical attraction to men for the purpose of having sex and an emotional/physical attraction to women. What was most interesting was when a guy started out in place #2 and slowly realized he was in place #1.

 

Did that make sense?

 

It's currently 5:13 in the morning. Nothing really makes sense right now as I'm exhausted. I have to be at work at 10. So I'll only be getting about 3 hours of sleep. I'm probably going to have return to this on Monday after I've had a full sleep tonight.

 

But I think the wording is confusing even at that best of times. But that may be due to the subject. Keeping my current befuddled state in mind is this restatement accurate

 

1. Guys struggling with wanting sex with women but emotional relationships with men

 

2. Guys struggling with wanting sex with men and emotional relationships with woman.

 

But even with this simplification of what you wrote, if I'm even correct, I'm going to have think about when I'm less tired. But it brings to mind what a bisexual friend of mine who just died (I'm writing a long post about this but I haven't finished ) said once Something about how (and I can't remember his exact wording) straight men were screwed -and not in a good way. They had to put up with being around women in order to get sex. My friend was long time married. And he said he was attracted to women. But he also at one point hired. I was never quite sure how far he went with escorts. But he dearly loved erotic massages from muscular men such as Giovani Volta, Derek from Florida, the long retired Gino (if I'm remembering his name correctly. He and Jason Land were in a relationship for a while), and I think he met Allen Silver a few times too.

 

Gman

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jgoo Community Regular

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Congrats on your date. Speaking for myself being a bisexual, to be with a man I have to be attracted to them physically (which makes it more about the sex than anything else). With regards to women I definitely need to be attracted to their personality (so more about the emotional relationship). So that is the opposite of the guy you met. By no means do I consider myself representative of the majority of bisexuals (or the minority), it is just me. In my interaction with other bisexuals I would say it is 50/50 for the two different preferences. Not sure that helps you or not.

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Gar1eth Grand Master

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Just to correct a possible misconception. I've had dates before. They just don't happen very frequently. My last date was in February (I don't consider hook-ups where you just go Over to someone's house to have sex a date) and that was the first in 2 years. My definition of a date in this case is we met and talked about ourselves a bit. We found we were attracted to each other and started making out-in public no less -at a park.

 

Gman

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RomanticRick Community Regular

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Aside from something involving vampires or hangmen's nooses is there any other type of necking? And just for the record my canines are of normal length and I don't know that many knots. ?

...

Gman

You're a true gentleman indeed! No one can accuse you of kissing and telling, well at least in the above post ? ?

Edited by RomanticRick
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Stormy Grand Master

Stormy

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Yes it's true!! I had a date!!! There's been a 3-1/2 month period of getting to know each other by text. But that's normal, right? ??

 

Actually what happened was the guy contacted me thru one of the hook-up apps, and left his phone number back on February. I contacted him by text. I think it took a day or so for him to respond. Then I responded back -and there was bubkes for a response until the early part of May. I probably did send an interim text in April because I really wanted to meet the guy. But again, he didn't respond until May. And even now he won't always respond to texts for three or more days. So it's frustrating. ??

 

When he did finally respond a week ago, he said he was under a deadline at work. But when it was finished, he wanted to meet. So we set up a day to meet earlier this week. That day he texts me that he's still too busy. But we managed to meet today for a bit. We went to a reopened coffee shop. We also managed to do a bit of necking in the parking lot.

 

He said he likes me. And he wants to meet again. I am worried about Corona-especially since I'm in a high risk group due to age and medical conditions. But I, as many of you are, am lonely. I don't even have any friends here to talk to. I think even though it scares me I'm going to have to go for it.

 

One thing I'd like to get some viewpoints on from our community here. This guy is bisexual. He says that with woman he has to be attracted to them physically. With men he has to be attracted to more to personality. For those of you who are bisexual or have dated bisexuals, I'm wondering if this is a common preference or idiosyncratic to this guy.

 

Gman

I have a friend who is now in his 80s who had an affair with a married bisexual man in his 40s. My friend is well read, smart and a great conversationalist This guy was definitely attracted more to these attributes and they ended up having a satisfactory sex life at least for a few years

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sniper Grand Master

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My encounters with bisexual guys tended to be EITHER they had a very specific type of guy that turned them on, whether that be super fit, super fat, or hairy, or smooth, or tattoos, etc.; OR they really didn't care much at all, possibly because they so rarely got with a guy that if the opportunity presented itself they would take it.

I will say I found to my surprise that a higher proportion of bi guys were LESS picky about looks than gay guys. Like the hottest guys I got with were bi, not gay. The hot gay guys by and large only would go with other hot guys. And there were certainly bi guys like that too, but not as many in my experience.

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RealAvalon Grand Master

RealAvalon

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Just to correct a possible misconception. I've had dates before. They just don't happen very frequently. My last date was in February (I don't consider hook-ups where you just go Over to someone's house to have sex a date) and that was the first in 2 years. My definition of a date in this case is we met and talked about ourselves a bit. We found we were attracted to each other and started making out-in public no less -at a park.

 

Gman

You've got a bit of a cheering squad going on here ;)

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RealAvalon Grand Master

RealAvalon

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Well they'll be clean. But exotic stuff doesn't look so good on us "full-figured" guys.

 

Gman

https://www.bing.com/images/search?view=detailV2&ccid=FdO2LwEN&id=6B0F6B334686C420102127F7221A9F04C3735F0D&thid=OIP.FdO2LwENjiJYHdp7qdte2QAAAA&mediaurl=http%3a%2f%2fchubstr.com%2fwp-content%2fuploads%2f2016%2f08%2fimg_2290.jpg&exph=600&expw=400&q=underwear+for+fat+men&simid=608013540442047375&selectedIndex=1&ajaxhist=0

https://chubstr.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/08/img_2298.jpg

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Gar1eth Grand Master

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Enjoy the date and do put on nice undies ?

Well they'll be clean. But exotic stuff doesn't look so good on us "full-figured" guys.

 

Gman

 

The second one can't be viewed. But the first one shows up in all its, uhh, glory. And after seeing it, I'll repeat my previous assertion now with picture proof to back it up, "But exotic stuff doesn't look so good on us 'full-figured' guys."???

 

Gman

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FreshFluff Grand Master

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One thing I'd like to get some viewpoints on from our community here. This guy is bisexual. He says that with woman he has to be attracted to them physically. With men he has to be attracted to more to personality. For those of you who are bisexual or have dated bisexuals, I'm wondering if this is a common preference or idiosyncratic to this guy.

 

Gman

 

This comes across as wanting relationships with men men and sex with women, but it's hard to know.

 

In any case, I'm glad to hear that you're finding someone to hang out with!

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purplekow Grand Master

+ purplekow

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I try not to classify myself but as I sleep with both men and women, many would say I am bisexual.

In my youth, the women with whom I had sex were mostly serial monogamous relationships with an ongoing feeling of warmth and respect. My limited interaction with men in my youth was basically drunken attempts to get my dick sucked.

After my wife died, and I was monogamous with her for many years, I had little desire for sex for about 1 year. After that, I found that I really did not want a relationship with a woman, I was just interested in sex. With men, as I started to sleep with them more, I found physical, mindless, come until I can't move anymore sex was great but now the one's with whom I want to have repeated encounters, are men who are physically alluring and personally intriguing. As time goes on, the women with whom I have sex, have to be more and more physically exciting and the men I have sex with need to have an initial attractiveness, which is much broader than it used to be, and the interpersonal relationship needs to be challenging and exciting.

One night stands are always an option if the other person pushes the right buttons as to appearance.

So my main point, even within one person's lifetime, sexual attraction varies. If this man is attracted to you and attractive to you right now, take the plunge.

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Gar1eth Grand Master

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Yes it's true!! I had a date!!! There's been a 3-1/2 month period of getting to know each other by text. But that's normal, right? ??

 

Actually what happened was the guy contacted me thru one of the hook-up apps, and left his phone number back on February. I contacted him by text. I think it took a day or so for him to respond. Then I responded back -and there was bubkes for a response until the early part of May. I probably did send an interim text in April because I really wanted to meet the guy. But again, he didn't respond until May. And even now he won't always respond to texts for three or more days. So it's frustrating. ??

 

When he did finally respond a week ago, he said he was under a deadline at work. But when it was finished, he wanted to meet. So we set up a day to meet earlier this week. That day he texts me that he's still too busy. But we managed to meet today for a bit. We went to a reopened coffee shop. We also managed to do a bit of necking in the parking lot.

 

He said he likes me. And he wants to meet again. I am worried about Corona-especially since I'm in a high risk group due to age and medical conditions. But I, as many of you are, am lonely. I don't even have any friends here to talk to. I think even though it scares me I'm going to have to go for it.

 

One thing I'd like to get some viewpoints on from our community here. This guy is bisexual. He says that with woman he has to be attracted to them physically. With men he has to be attracted to more to personality. For those of you who are bisexual or have dated bisexuals, I'm wondering if this is a common preference or idiosyncratic to this guy.

 

Gman

This comes across as wanting relationships with men men and sex with women, but it's hard to know.

 

In any case, I'm glad to hear that you're finding someone to hang out with!

 

Thanks, Fluff. He mentioned having more women friends than men. And I don't think all of those were sex partners. He also said he had girlfriends growing up and some play time with guys Right now he has a few women he sees-he's part of one or several poly groups., and he says he's a top with them-possibly dominant. And while he says he's not a sub with men, he is a bottom, wants that type of masculine encounters in his life. But where you might think-ok he's basically straight-he's just one of those guys who likes prostate stimulation, he says he's not into one night stands so much, prefers to be friends with his sex partners -at least on the male side (I don't care that much about his female encoutners), really enjoyed making out with me, and got nicely hard from it as far as I could tell from feeling his groin thru his pants while we kissed.

 

So in his case it's not just that he wants to be "pegged," he also seems to enjoy the emotional component too.

 

Gman

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