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I rarely post, but what do you think of someone you find as a client you are in love with?


Guest timely4u
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Guest timely4u

As a private escort in New York I met a wonderful client I realize I am in love with and I know he is in love with me. Now that is the fact, in 10 years of private escorting I am not sure what to do. Do you guys have advice?

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Guest timely4u

As a private escort in New York I met a wonderful client I realize I am in love with and I know he is in love with me. Now that is the fact, in 10 years of private escorting I am not sure what to do. Do you guys have advice?

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Guest allansmith63

lovestruck

 

Tough to answer your post without knowing more information. You don't mention if either or both of you are both single or not, is the client in the closet?, how long you've been client/escort, etc.

 

(My tendency as somewhat of a romantic is to say "go for it" and all of the issues will settle out, but life generally is not so simple.)

 

IMHO think that you will get far better advice from people who may have been in your situation if you provide a little more information.

 

A

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Guest allansmith63

lovestruck

 

Tough to answer your post without knowing more information. You don't mention if either or both of you are both single or not, is the client in the closet?, how long you've been client/escort, etc.

 

(My tendency as somewhat of a romantic is to say "go for it" and all of the issues will settle out, but life generally is not so simple.)

 

IMHO think that you will get far better advice from people who may have been in your situation if you provide a little more information.

 

A

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Guest NYCMuscBoy

Do you really exist? Are you really an escort? Sorry, but I have trouble believing someone who spent 10 years as a "private escort" (?) would rely on us, the hags on this message board, for advice. *

 

If you are indeed an escort, what's the big conundrum? You aren't a nun -- you won't have trouble leaving the convent -- your client knows what your up to so you have no secrets.

 

 

* Meaning "Hags" in the friendliest possible way, of course.

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Guest NYCMuscBoy

Do you really exist? Are you really an escort? Sorry, but I have trouble believing someone who spent 10 years as a "private escort" (?) would rely on us, the hags on this message board, for advice. *

 

If you are indeed an escort, what's the big conundrum? You aren't a nun -- you won't have trouble leaving the convent -- your client knows what your up to so you have no secrets.

 

 

* Meaning "Hags" in the friendliest possible way, of course.

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Guest Quinte

Do you think the client is likely going to "forget" the fact that you are/were an escort and never bring it up at the most unfortunate time?

 

I am so happy and sad for you at the same time. I too have come pretty close to this... Gee.

 

You raise a very good question. I shall follow it with much interest. Also if you find the time, lets talk a little privately.

 

Quinte DuSoleil

 

http://www.rentboy.com/quinte

http://communities.msn.com/qdus

[email protected]

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Guest Quinte

Do you think the client is likely going to "forget" the fact that you are/were an escort and never bring it up at the most unfortunate time?

 

I am so happy and sad for you at the same time. I too have come pretty close to this... Gee.

 

You raise a very good question. I shall follow it with much interest. Also if you find the time, lets talk a little privately.

 

Quinte DuSoleil

 

http://www.rentboy.com/quinte

http://communities.msn.com/qdus

[email protected]

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RE: lovestruck

 

I agree with Allan.

 

It would be easier to give advice knowing more details, but I understand not wanting to share them.

 

I would say go for it. I would suggest discussing your status as an escort openly and honestly. Clearly, he knows you escort. But discuss the future, would you continue to escort and if so what are the groundrules? You need to set some time on a regular basis when you know for sure you'll be around and available to your partner, a "date", something you wouldn't dare to cancel or break.

 

There's nothing wrong with falling in love with a client, I think it's charming :) While I hire a lot of guys, I don't expect or necessarily even want the guy I see to fall in love with me. Yes, I want him to like me, as a friend, but that's pretty much the extent of it.

 

Best of luck, hope you can resolve it well for both of you!

 

Hugs,

NYO

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RE: lovestruck

 

I agree with Allan.

 

It would be easier to give advice knowing more details, but I understand not wanting to share them.

 

I would say go for it. I would suggest discussing your status as an escort openly and honestly. Clearly, he knows you escort. But discuss the future, would you continue to escort and if so what are the groundrules? You need to set some time on a regular basis when you know for sure you'll be around and available to your partner, a "date", something you wouldn't dare to cancel or break.

 

There's nothing wrong with falling in love with a client, I think it's charming :) While I hire a lot of guys, I don't expect or necessarily even want the guy I see to fall in love with me. Yes, I want him to like me, as a friend, but that's pretty much the extent of it.

 

Best of luck, hope you can resolve it well for both of you!

 

Hugs,

NYO

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Guest timely4u

Quinte and all those that responded, thank you for your good advise.

I have been an escort for 10 years and am proud of it and it does not worry me that it may come up in the future.

My concern is do I give up a fine a lucrative career and take a risk on love. In my heart I have already made that decision, but what if it fails? If I give the wonderful men who have sustained me for all these years the word that I am in love and most move on will they forgive me and move on with their lives?

Actually, as you guys know, I really care about these guys.

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Guest timely4u

Quinte and all those that responded, thank you for your good advise.

I have been an escort for 10 years and am proud of it and it does not worry me that it may come up in the future.

My concern is do I give up a fine a lucrative career and take a risk on love. In my heart I have already made that decision, but what if it fails? If I give the wonderful men who have sustained me for all these years the word that I am in love and most move on will they forgive me and move on with their lives?

Actually, as you guys know, I really care about these guys.

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Seems to me that they would most all be willing, except for their privacy issues, to be your best men and bridesmaids. If they have been coming to you for years, they care for you in their way and want what is best for you. If not, well, as we say, "If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it loves you. If it doesn't, shoot it." Seriously though, it's in their better interests too. If in your heart you don't want to be there, even if you don't turn bitter about the missed opportunity, it will show in your work, in small ways. And there is a bit of worse service for them. They will be able to replace you as a business but you will always be in their hearts. And in a year or two if the relationship doesn't work out, it will be surprisingly easy for you to get back into the business. - One possible problem with this is = What kind of escorting do you do? If you are a leather master for hire, is there someone in your vicinity whom you trust with your clients? Knowledgeable and safe? There isn't another here in Houston and I do feel badly about some of my clients now that I am retired. - For that matter, no matter what kind of escorting you do, maybe it will make you feel better if you recommend a friend or two to replace you to your best clients? I know I always enjoy matchmaking.

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Seems to me that they would most all be willing, except for their privacy issues, to be your best men and bridesmaids. If they have been coming to you for years, they care for you in their way and want what is best for you. If not, well, as we say, "If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it loves you. If it doesn't, shoot it." Seriously though, it's in their better interests too. If in your heart you don't want to be there, even if you don't turn bitter about the missed opportunity, it will show in your work, in small ways. And there is a bit of worse service for them. They will be able to replace you as a business but you will always be in their hearts. And in a year or two if the relationship doesn't work out, it will be surprisingly easy for you to get back into the business. - One possible problem with this is = What kind of escorting do you do? If you are a leather master for hire, is there someone in your vicinity whom you trust with your clients? Knowledgeable and safe? There isn't another here in Houston and I do feel badly about some of my clients now that I am retired. - For that matter, no matter what kind of escorting you do, maybe it will make you feel better if you recommend a friend or two to replace you to your best clients? I know I always enjoy matchmaking.

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PPlaying Devil's advocate

 

Timely,

 

I offer you my genuine congratulations on finding someone special in your life. I'm writing this note partially in exploration of my own feelings at the moment having broken up with my boyfriend at the end of June and am currently in the process of getting back together with him with jealousy being part of the issue.

 

I'm curious what is providing the impetus about your leaving the escorting realm. There's at least one example of a 'scort (Leandream) who chimes in here fairly frequently, who has a non-'scort boyfriend who is *now* completely aware of Leandreams profession and seems OK with it.

 

Before you met your love, you were able to care about your clients as more than mere economic entities, and still seem to care about them as friends. So is it that having sex with somebody other than your love feels like a denial of the special place he has in your heart? Or is it that you're concerned that he will be distanced by it?

 

I'm one of those folks who have a distinctly different experience between sex and romance,

and believes that they are not the same. I acknowledge that there are other folks, my boyfriend among them, who can't distinguish between them and thinks that people like my are just fooling ourselves.

 

There are perfectly valid reasons for wanting to find some other career than 'scorting, but I just wanted to raise the issue that it wasn't a foregone conclusion that a 'scort who meets a lad need suddenly find other employement.

 

Bless you and good luck!

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PPlaying Devil's advocate

 

Timely,

 

I offer you my genuine congratulations on finding someone special in your life. I'm writing this note partially in exploration of my own feelings at the moment having broken up with my boyfriend at the end of June and am currently in the process of getting back together with him with jealousy being part of the issue.

 

I'm curious what is providing the impetus about your leaving the escorting realm. There's at least one example of a 'scort (Leandream) who chimes in here fairly frequently, who has a non-'scort boyfriend who is *now* completely aware of Leandreams profession and seems OK with it.

 

Before you met your love, you were able to care about your clients as more than mere economic entities, and still seem to care about them as friends. So is it that having sex with somebody other than your love feels like a denial of the special place he has in your heart? Or is it that you're concerned that he will be distanced by it?

 

I'm one of those folks who have a distinctly different experience between sex and romance,

and believes that they are not the same. I acknowledge that there are other folks, my boyfriend among them, who can't distinguish between them and thinks that people like my are just fooling ourselves.

 

There are perfectly valid reasons for wanting to find some other career than 'scorting, but I just wanted to raise the issue that it wasn't a foregone conclusion that a 'scort who meets a lad need suddenly find other employement.

 

Bless you and good luck!

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Guest Nice Guy

Dear Timely

As a client... I have in the past, been in the same situation, only reversed. It is a tuff call. I have met some incredable gentlemen during MY career. I just ended a 20 year relationship. I don't want another one right now. Escorts fill a very wonderful need for me. And at times it's hard to separate the biz from the feelings. I have been there and it can hurt. It is usually the client that falls in love and the escort who has to "correct" the situation. In your case, it is mutual. No correcting necessary...love is love... and the Man that loves you, knows, or should know you well by now. I am guilty of falling in love, or maybe it was lust, but in any event it was special. If you love the guy go for it. If you have to change professions, so be it,but if you don't take that chance, you will never know. I would just asoon take my chances. And I will again, if the situation comes along! We only do this once... it may take a couple of times to get it right, so be it.

Best of luck to you. NG

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Guest Nice Guy

Dear Timely

As a client... I have in the past, been in the same situation, only reversed. It is a tuff call. I have met some incredable gentlemen during MY career. I just ended a 20 year relationship. I don't want another one right now. Escorts fill a very wonderful need for me. And at times it's hard to separate the biz from the feelings. I have been there and it can hurt. It is usually the client that falls in love and the escort who has to "correct" the situation. In your case, it is mutual. No correcting necessary...love is love... and the Man that loves you, knows, or should know you well by now. I am guilty of falling in love, or maybe it was lust, but in any event it was special. If you love the guy go for it. If you have to change professions, so be it,but if you don't take that chance, you will never know. I would just asoon take my chances. And I will again, if the situation comes along! We only do this once... it may take a couple of times to get it right, so be it.

Best of luck to you. NG

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  • 2 weeks later...
Guest timely4u

I have spoken with each of my clients and each of them in varying degrees though somewhat disappointed seemed genuinely happy for me. I know we will remain close friends for many years to come and that is very exciting as their friendship really means a great deal to me.

 

My new life with the guy I have fallen in love with offers challenges that I frankly never thought much about such as monogomy and living each day with the same man and wanting it that way. Just the prospect and the pleasure of having unprotected sex is something I am looking forward to in a few months. We have decided to spend our first weekend together in his house at The Pines and as this is a holiday weekend the mood is one of celebration despite the rain.

 

I even started this morning on my new profession which in fact I have been doing on the side for quite some time that is writing. My 10 years in prostitution provides me with a wealth of personal experience and insight to draw upon in my writing.

 

I want to thank each one of you who responded to me on this thread and I plan to keep you guys posted.

 

Thank you,

Casey

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Guest timely4u

I have spoken with each of my clients and each of them in varying degrees though somewhat disappointed seemed genuinely happy for me. I know we will remain close friends for many years to come and that is very exciting as their friendship really means a great deal to me.

 

My new life with the guy I have fallen in love with offers challenges that I frankly never thought much about such as monogomy and living each day with the same man and wanting it that way. Just the prospect and the pleasure of having unprotected sex is something I am looking forward to in a few months. We have decided to spend our first weekend together in his house at The Pines and as this is a holiday weekend the mood is one of celebration despite the rain.

 

I even started this morning on my new profession which in fact I have been doing on the side for quite some time that is writing. My 10 years in prostitution provides me with a wealth of personal experience and insight to draw upon in my writing.

 

I want to thank each one of you who responded to me on this thread and I plan to keep you guys posted.

 

Thank you,

Casey

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