Adulting 101

[MrMattBig]

https://www.presence.io/blog/105-adulting-101-program-ideas/

What is everyones thoughts?

I know I would have benefited by lessons in insurance, cars, credit, apartments and much more once turning 18.

[rvwnsd]

When I was in high school in the late 1970's/early 1980's "Consumer Education" was a required course for Chicago Public Schools high school students. Not sure whether other school districts required something similar, but it was a valuable course.

[MrMattBig]

When I was in high school in the late 1970's/early 1980's "Consumer Education" was a required course for Chicago Public Schools high school students. Not sure whether other school districts required something similar, but it was a valuable course.

When I was in high school we had a similar course about life skills, but it was widely regarded as a joke then by students as it was always taught by a teacher that was just picking up an extra class for extra money and not caring. In retrospect, didn't come close either to what we really needed to know.

Writing a check, balancing a check book fail in comparison to understanding what percentage of your income should be spent on rent, food, entertainment, savings. Realistic views on apartment requirements, buying versus leasing a car, gap insurance, how credit history works are all things that have fucked me over. Roommate etiquette has been something I have seen first hand others desperately need. Escorting, I find adults of all ages desperately lack concise communication skills as well. High school should teach all this and more as life skills, instead of how to write a check, format an email, write a resume. That's all important, but there is so much more. I would love adulting 101 to lead to Common sense 101 as well though lol. I feel that's where it starts.

[Guest]

Interesting, I was reading law books in fifth grade and Money magazine in fourth...

 

while High School should “teach” many things, it’s still incumbent on the student to “learn”...and there’s a case to be made that life skills should be taught in the home as well.

 

but the website is good indeed

[+ Keith30309]

Terrific idea. I had a long chat last week with a guy I met in SA about if he could afford a specific apartment, The things that seem obvious - how to not get screwed on a car repair, how to not mess up your credit score and why it’s important, lease vs. buy of a car, office politics 101, how to write a credit dispute letter, etc., - aren’t obvious if you’ve never heard anything about them.

[jjkrkwood]

The things you need to know you will learn thru experience, which IMO is the best way to learn. There are many, many things you probably will NEVER need to know , so why waste your time with a class ? Focus on things at hand, however for those seeking a broader spectrum of knowledge, a class is OK, but I hate cluttering my mind with stuff that I might never need...

 

I have however taken classes at The Learning Annex, so I suppose I just shot down my own argument ?

[+ Keith30309]

I think a class is helpful.

I made a ton of stupid mistakes along the way in every conceivable facet of life and that’s a really painful way to learn, particularly when you find yourself living in your car. Just being forearmed with the awareness that there are solutions to problems that feel insurmountable is of benefit. For me that is one of the secret pleasures of meeting guys on SA - talking thru problems that are troubling to them.

[+ poolboy48220]

We had two teachers in high school who taught economics. One taught classical economics, micro vs macro, etc, while the other taught more practical life skills, like balancing a checkbook.

 

I had a roommate, a guy in his 40's who'd just ended a long-term relationship where the other guy handled EVERYTHING practical. He didn't even have a checking account when he moved in with me. I did what I could to teach him.

[+ bigjoey]

I have written before about volunteering in the Kansas City school system. Fresh out of law school, a friend and I wrote a course on law for the school system’s “Family Life” class which I went on to teach for nine years.

 

The class was all practical, hands-on knowledge for the students real lives:

Criminal Law-mostly things like what are my rights when the police stop me (Do I have to open my car trunk?)

Employment Law-things like getting paid on time and overtime and discrimination

Family Law-I am pregnant, what does my boyfriend owe me for support?

Contract Law-things like I signed up for the “Columbia Record-of-the-Month Club” and I want to stop.

Everything was very practical and the students were all very attentive and engaged because it was real life for them rather than abstract Constitutional law.

[+ WilliamM]

When I was in high school in the late 1970's/early 1980's "Consumer Education" was a required course for Chicago Public Schools high school students. Not sure whether other school districts required something similar, but it was a valuable course.

 

Ok only if high schools also offer a course on recent United States history.

Just as important, I think.

[+ Topseed]

I’m always amazed when my Boomer-era contemporaries show little knowledge of financial planning, compound interest, consumer finance...the list goes on.

 

I agree with all of this. Perhaps first we should emphasize basic math...a little of that goes far.

 

I think students should learn how to diagram sentences, but that’s another topic. I remember doing that until my knuckles bled. (Yes, a Catholic grade school, taught by penguins.)

[+ keroscenefire]

I have actually taught a class like this to high school seniors. We actually went to a credit union and had a bank representative explain the different types of accounts and why it's important to know how much money you have in each (avoiding overdrafting, etc). The credit union also does car loans so we explained what is involved in buying a car, car insurance and looking at used vs. new cars. We toured an apartment community and explained the costs of renting, living with roommates vs living alone, and what is on an apartment lease and the the rights of both renters and landlords. We did a budgeting class where we looked at what income is needed to have a certain lifestyle. We did sexual education including information on where to get birth control and STI testing. We gave lost of condoms away of course. And then we even did a basic cooking course where each student had to successfully make their own grilled cheese sandwich.

Edited February 5, 2020 by keroscenefire

[+ José Soplanucas]

I was tricked by my poor English. I was expecting education on adult entertainment business. I need some.

[LivingnLA]

I fully support this because it's a set of basic life skills that parents used to always pass on but as society has become more and more complex, they don't always know enough or have the time to pass these things on. In my experiences, those of us in the top percentiles who aren't of extreme wealth, teach our kids all of these and many other skills and tips to get ahead and stay ahead.

[rvwnsd]

Ok only if high schools also offer a course on recent United States history.

Just as important, I think.

The Chicago Board of Education was 39 years ahead of you. I took the Consumer Education coursework as part of Contemporary American History. Our "textbooks" were Time, Newsweek, and US News and World Report.

[+ sniper]

You could teach all this to fifth graders but they'd forget it within a year. Same thing if you teach it in high school. By the time it's time to use it, people will have forgotten it. The people who "don't want to think about money" simply won't do it and will find themselves in trouble anyway. I know far too many people who are more than capable intellectually of handling money who are ALWAYS in a shortfall because they "spend the next raise," spend to fill the void in their hearts, etc. and no academic class is going to teach them that what they actually need is discipline. These are the people who should just pick up a book by Suze Orman or Dave Ramsey(but skip the religious nuttery) and do it themselves. There are ample CHEAP resources out there.

[+ sniper]

The above may have come off harsher than I intended. But my position remains a HS class would do little good because the people who need it won't be paying any attention, and the people who do pay attention aren't the ones who need it.

3 of my 4 boomer siblings have zero retirement savings, and truth be told, zero net worth. One is in a nursing home so it's moot. The other two will be working until they drop, despite both having college degrees.

[MrMattBig]

You could teach all this to fifth graders but they'd forget it within a year. Same thing if you teach it in high school. By the time it's time to use it, people will have forgotten it. The people who "don't want to think about money" simply won't do it and will find themselves in trouble anyway. I know far too many people who are more than capable intellectually of handling money who are ALWAYS in a shortfall because they "spend the next raise," spend to fill the void in their hearts, etc. and no academic class is going to teach them that what they actually need is discipline. These are the people who should just pick up a book by Suze Orman or Dave Ramsey(but skip the religious nuttery) and do it themselves. There are ample CHEAP resources out there.

This is all true.

I closed 2 credit cards after I paid them off when I was about 21, when I should have kept them open

I had no clue that it takes YEARS of good standing open accounts to have "established credit".

If there was someone around to tell me this, I would be in a way better position credit wise than where I am today. Impulsiveness and responsibility you do have to more or less learn with failure and experience, but big things like credit, cars, housing, health insurance....we don't always have perfect parents around....I feel like I wasted my 20s in these subjects because high school didn't fill the shortfall of my parents preparing me for adulthood.

[MrMattBig]

Sometimes you really can't make a camel drink after leading it to water.

But does anyone else feel like me, that their 20s were wasted or could have been better if taught how to "adult"?

[+ sniper]

Plenty of people say this, but the odds are they likely lacked the maturity to take the advice even if it was given. It doesn't help that we have a culture that encourages people to think of themselves as temporarily embarrassed millionaires. I've had friends who make $200k/year say they don't bother saving, because "they can always make more money." It'll work for one or two of them, and the rest just won't know what happened.

[Walker1]

yep many lessons.

College debt on useless courses can saddle you for life. You should look at the earning potential of your degree, job placement and also a lesson on the vagaries of the economy-before signing up to take on debt that you cannot discharge in bankruptcy.

 

Marriage and divorce and alimony and child support and they vary by state. Surprisingly many divorcees in my circle were shocked at the laws and never thought they would end up divorced. Picking a spouse should be very important.

 

Police are good when you are a victim of crime. but otherwise, we throw more people in jail than any nation on earth. Crimes that does not harm anyone can be considered felonies and you have a record for life that you can't escape from. Never talk to cops thinking they are your friends-sad, but in today's America, wise.

 

Those are things I thinks everal of my friends and me would appreciated if we had known when young and dumb.

[+ sniper]

Please note I'm not saying YOU wouldn't have taken the advice. Just most 20soemthings whose friends are all going to Cancun on a credit card won't want to miss out.

[Chad Constantine]

I was thankfully blessed with good family because even from a young age I was always pushed to do things even when I did not want to. Most of the skills on the list I got from being in boy scouts and the rest I got from a young age. I was payed to do chores and when I wanted to buy something I had to pay for myself with my allowance. I was forced to open CDS and savings accounts and talk to the banks tellers by myself. When I got my first job had to pay back my school loans and pay rent at my own house. Every time I would be so upset and feel wronged, except when I went to boy scouts, because all my other friends and cousins didn't have to do this but now I am glad I did have that type of upbringing.

[Monarchy79]

Fantastic topic and link!!!

when I was about 10, my mom had me go to her bank and create a “young savers” account. Came with a check book and ATM card. I’d use it to manage my allowances, from good grades, gifts, and yard work.

Both of my parents would use time we spend in the car (road trips, commuting, etc.) to talk about life stuff, and they were programming me without even realizing it. We talked about finances, life skills, hygiene, sex, dynamics with people in general.

 

I specifically remember my father telling me this : “Son.... there are three things you must always make sure you have in order: you license, your credit, and your taxes.”

I’ll admit... keeping these things straight has made life so convenient.

I also remember my grandfather always telling be about having a “hustle”....

That was wise too.

I always made sure to have secondary income (in addition to my foundation career), to pad my pockets for vacations, clothes, and other trinkets.

So many people are grown and clueless because their parents didn’t teach them anything.

[KeepItReal]

This is probably one of those cases where your upbringing can make a difference. I was lucky to be raised by a frugal grandmother and had plenty of role models that taught me how to adult. Not everyone is that lucky.

 

Sometimes you really can't make a camel drink after leading it to water.

But does anyone else feel like me, that their 20s were wasted or could have been better if taught how to "adult"?

 

A high school graduate level class could be of value, but the success of most of my high school classes depended on the teacher when I did not have a natural interest in the topic. If they can make the topic come alive for you... Given a choice I would have preferred to have access to a class like this. Don't quite feel like I wasted time, but had I fully grasped the concept of compounding interest, for example, I would have switched from "saving" mode to "investing" mode years earlier. ?