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And this is where I hit the "too much dialogue" problem. Guys who offer a massage and I ask if they are trained. When I want a massage, even if I want a massage + more, I still want a good massage. I was a LMT for a lot of years, and I really prefer someone who knows what they're doing. And, I might want a HE or more (at a higher rate). For me, there is nothing worse than someone advertising massage (instead of body rub) and not knowing how to give a massage.

Slightly off-target on the topic, but totally relevant. I recently read through a white-paper on the methods used by various people based on the generation. Baby boomers prefer face-to-face, phone, or paper. Many struggle with using apps. Gen Xers prefer phone, email or desktop apps. They find texting intrusive, unless they are from family. Millennials think phone calls are intrusive. Texts and social media is fine/normal, but hate depersonalized messages. They accept apps and mobile sites with ease. Gen Z (Zoomers) avoid phone calls and will ignore most of them. Texting directly is weird. They prefer social media, and expect apps with direct messaging to their apps. Couple this with RM's changes and you get a nice overview of how to reach your target market.

It's all about the communication. The conversations aren't "easy". But they don't have to be "difficult" either. It comes down to being honest with yourself and with them about what 'services' fit into each box. Example: if he gives you a call and say you feel like going to see a movie. You go to dinner and a movie and even hang out later. That's friendship. However, If you end up swapping blow jobs, that's not friendship. Or maybe, blow jobs are fine, but it depends on whether it is during his normal work hours, or on afternoons when he isn't working. Or, it depends on who initiates. Or, who gets to top who. Whatever the definition is for you and him, as long as you both (1) respect and (2) keep communicating, then it can work. I always feel that this is true regardless of what type of relationship you have with a person. I even hold that true for colleagues/subordinates/bosses at work who become outside of work friends.

So, I'll speak in the minority (maybe). You are giving your power away. You are turning yourself into a victim and you should take a breath for a moment. Regardless of the fact that we don't have all the details, that's not important. We aren't involved and can only respond to the details you've shared. We are neither judge nor jury. My opinion is only based on your current information. You need to accept that you are giving him your power. Sorry. And I know it is scary. It is probably because you are 'embarrassed', 'ashamed', 'afraid', <fill-in-the-blank> of him revealing or outing you. This is really about him stalking you and taking advantage of your giving him your voice and power. That doesn't mean ignore it and hope it goes away. You do need to take your power back. Three possible suggestions: Suggestion 1: Tell him you owe him nothing and that if he continues to harass you, you will go to authorities. You consider his behavior bullying, abusive, and harassment, and unacceptable. You are ceasing all communication and further attempts by him will result in you going to the police. Suggestion 2: Stop ALL communication. If he calls, hang-up without saying anything. If he texts, block the texts. However he communicates, do NOT respond. You're reaction is a lever for him to control you. If you don't get riled, then he has no control. Suggestion 3: Go ahead and report it to the authorities. Talk to an attorney and listen to their advice. You do not have to lie about it. You don't have to obfuscate. If need be, tell them the truth. The issue here is about escalating behavior and stalking. Just my tuppence. Just for the record, I am not a lawyer, nor do I play one on TV.

I can definitely recommend. He is a definite yes!

Stay strong. Clear boundaries and limits. Communication, communication, and communication. If he can't, then no massage is worth the psychologist visit

It isn't just a fantasy, but it takes a heightened maturity to have that level of communication. Most people rarely communicate that clearly, hence blurry lines. I have seen it work once. But the dos, and don't, were tough conversations. In the end it worked for about 5 years, until thr jealousy crept in. 😞 they made a cute couple

There is a lot of discussion about clients confusing the boundaries and turning a paid-for experience into something more. I think you have the opposite issue. The provider is blurring the lines. It sounds like he might genuinely enjoy your experiences, but still wants to have his time paid for. That's creating a lack of clarity. You might want to decide for yourself if you want to explore a relationship or just keep it professional. Once you decide for yourself, you need to have an clear communication with him so that there is no mix up. One thing you shouldn't do, is allow the dysfunctional aspect to continue. You are already starting to feel awkward (or you wouldn't be asking). By the way, there is nothing wrong with having a for-pay fuck buddy that is really turned on by you.

As with all marketing and branding, it is in the messaging. Someone here or on RM can certainly add to their listed links an icon link for their websites.. where it gets gawdy or detracts from the shoppers intent is where, I think, it goes wrong. When the verbiage directs you to a pay wall site for info...red flag. RM is where shoppers go for live interaction, so directing their attention elsewhere is the disconnect. Directing someone to a scheduling or information site, is good even it shows links for OF. For me, I might prefer for you to show it to me while we are together, before we slept together. Hehe

Now wondering if Simon has a OF page. Nah.. don't care... I'll wait for the real thing.

I've had the same initial reaction. And recently had a last minute change of plans. The provider asked to push it back a couple of hours. The difference for me was he was willing to meet the original time and asked a favor after explaining his reason. In return, I offered a different day/time or the original. He agreed to the alternative and thanked me. The encounter with him on the new appointment was FANTASTIC. We were communicating and had developed a rapport. That made all the difference.

The lack of a face pic is always a non-starter for me. I can get a faceless encounter if I want. Since people always try to show themselves in the best possible way, if they hide something... well... there is a reason.

The 'place to meet' is an obstacle. I don't invite people back to my home until I have a chance to meet them once. I was considering a hotel nearby, but got an uneasy feeling when he suggested a low quality place.

I think I start to see why you wanted to a difference between male and female escorts. It is strictly supply and demand versus expectations. With women, there are more options. So they have to be more attentive to trying trying to convince to give up your money but with guys there are fewer and they tend to be traveling from city to city.. As a result the supply is lower and it's equally on both the provider and the cliento make sure it works. But you are also right in that there are a lot more gay 4 pay. It sounds like you really want to be with someone who enjoys gay sex. Just be careful with the filters because there are a lot of gay guys who don't list gay and instead or marketing towards guys who wanna be with str8 men.

You have already gotten a bunch of good advice. Sounds like you're in mid-Suffolk, so that could be the biggest obstacle. We both know that people in NYC'ers are not likely to have cars. They see someone from Suffolk County and don't bother. To overcome this, you may want to consider changing your approach and in your original contact let them know you'd like to bring them out to Long Island for a visit/day/trip/weekend. Or, let them know you're willing to meet them in NYC. Or, let them know you're arranging for car service. As for finding the right one or filtering... I leave as many filters off as possible. Many guys skip over certain settings. If you filter in Body Type: Jock, and a nice jock-type doesn't check the "Jock" box, then you'll miss them. Look for guys that have had longer term active profiles by looking at the Member Since or Joined On dates. Also, the number of profile visits will give you an idea on how long they've been around. New profiles tend to be chancy and if you want a serious professional, you want someone who knows the industry. But as for the which app... RM is probably the best place. Just don't limit the area or distance. At least half of the guys are traveling around the country. In the hetero market, there are lots of choices next door, no matter where you live. In our market, the guys are willing to travel more, but they need to see you as serious and direct. Just my tuppence.

And if you want more details, feel free to dm

I find it easier to ask an escort if they have massage training if I want a mixed appointment. Sets some expectations if what I want is more than a massage.

You are welcome to disagree. I am perfectly okay with disagreement. And to be clear, I never said, nor felt, implied or otherwise thought, he owed me anything. I put my reason for posting in my post. I respect his decision either way.

Ah.. yeah... th3n 8t is a lame exuse...option b Good for you

Hi Gabriel. Thank you for the post. The forum can attract one offs or even competitors that take a stab at drumming up issues. It isn't exclusive to any one place. After reading your response, I was left with more, not less, doubts about all the peeps involved. The original flame out was more or less dismissed. Those kind of direct reviews, in public, from a newbie are not something I put any stock in. The same reaction tends from the 180 degree response. Now your comments are understandable, but it sounded more of a gut reaction and defensive. That isn't to say you shouldn't react. Most of the readers here didn't say or do anything to trigger this. When some starts with the 'I will only respond once and that's it' approach... well that's not helpful marketing. I accept that you RM profile reviews are genuine and sincere. But your style here reads unapproachable. So, my thought...is that someone I would want to be around for an experience? By the way, that's the purpose of my response. To find out.

In General, He'd be expected to pay for round trip air,, round trip to the hotel,nd for a reasonable predium meal. He's booking you for the day even though he's only going to use 3-5 Hours of that time. If you want to add Anything then that's on you and any cost changes as a result are on you. As an aside even if hes only using a short portion of your time. He? Is. Paying for the day and if he has an opportunity to call you or make other arrangements with you. I think it's appropriate for you to be available.

Well, when you settle out let me know where... or if you are in So FL let's see about it. My husband used to snore and wear a face mask. And that's why king sized and california king size beds were made

I actually have more forgiveness for the overslept part. Less so for the not immediately apologizing and offering compensation. We all make mistakes and it's about what we do after the mistake happens. It's why I wouldn't write the client off immediately but would be more guarded on the next time. And look for some way to get compensated either in money or in clarifying the boundaries..

Respect for offer the money. And respect to them for refusing. It would be about whether I wanted to make it work next time, or write it off. I would have felt appropriate to either (a) leave some portion for his recognition of the issue, and make an attempt re-schedule, or (b) accept that you won't see him and respect his wishes with a "Thank You."

I'd be tempted just to experience you on this. I feel like it is a challenge gauntlet. Well, I'm very tempted to pick it up.