saminseattle

I wasn’t aware of the prior name or discussions, but for what it’s worth, I saw him a few weeks ago and certainly enjoyed our time together.

On a visit to San Francisco a couple of years ago, I had a couple of very enjoyable massages from Dino. It looks like he is still advertising. https://rentmasseur.com/Dinoseur

I met Mr. Gaite on one of his visits here and had a great time. We get a lot of talented visitors coming these days as well as more local folks advertising than in the past. I suspect this is all related to demographic and economic factors. There’s a lot of new money with Amazon being headquartered here and related tech. field growth, and the population has grown faster here than any other big city in the country over the last decade. https://tdn.com/news/state-and-regional/seattle-officially-fastest-growing-big-city-of-the-decade/article_0e78af34-189e-52b0-9ff2-285c10796965.html

Yes, state laws do define sex with considerable specificity in various contexts. For example, in the State of New York, where I believe you live, prostitution is a crime, but what does this mean exactly? Well, “A person is guilty of prostitution when such person engages or agrees or offers to engage in sexual conduct with another person in return for a fee.” (This is Section 230 of the NYS Penal Code which you can find with a simple google search.) But what exactly is “sexual conduct?” Well, New York says it is “sexual intercourse, oral sexual conduct, anal sexual conduct, aggravated sexual contact, or sexual contact.” Section 130(10). Each of these terms is further defined. For example, “sexual intercourse has its ordinary meaning and occurs upon any penetration, however slight,” “oral sexual conduct means conduct between persons consisting of contact between the mouth and the penis, the mouth and the anus, or the mouth and the vulva or vagina,” “anal sexual conduct” mean conduct between persons consisting of contact between the penis and anus.” So, a “blow job” definitely qualifies as “sexual conduct,” and it’s a crime to pay for one. But what about a “hand job” or “fingering” someone’s ass? Well, that’s where the definition of “sexual contact” comes in, which is extremely broad: “Sexual contact means any touching of the sexual or other intimate parts of a person for the purpose of gratifying sexual desire of either party. It includes the touching of the actor by the victim, as well as the touching of the victim by the actor, whether directly or through clothing, as well as the emission of ejaculate by the actor upon any part of the victim, clothed or unclothed.” So, a “hand job” definitely counts and people should keep in mind that if this is included as part of a massage, the parties are engaged in a form of prostitution. Fingering someone’s ass would almost certainly also count as sexual contact. But if your doctor is doing a “digital exam” to check for possible internal hemorrhoids or something, that is presumably not being done to gratify sexual desires so it won’t count (though I note that given some recent controversies about doctor conduct, it might depend on the specific situation…there is also a specific exception in New York to what might otherwise be a sex offense if it is conducted “for a valid medical or mental health care purpose.”). Touching the perineum is a closer question, but I think most people would consider this area an “intimate part” of their person, so if the touching there is done for pleasure, I think it would count as “sexual contact” and it would probably be a crime to pay someone to touch you there, even if they did nothing else. At the same time, this kind of touching would not qualify as “sex” in the sense of “sexual intercourse” because there is no penetration (even a slight one). And some offenses require more than just sexual contact (1st, 2nd, and 3rd degree rape for example, all require sexual intercourse, in NYS at least). The whole topic does raise interesting issues, like whether “muscle worship” is prostitution etc. One thing I always thought was strange about the original RB complaint was their focus on things like sneaker sniffing, which does not seem to fit any of these definitions of sex. So, while it might be perceived as “weird,” it is hardly illegal.

I have met him on a few occasions over the last several years and have always enjoyed spending time with him, though I should note that I have never experienced his massage. Incidentally, I don’t think he’s from New Orleans, but Mexico City. If you search for Armann, you will find a number of threads that reference him, with almost all positive comments. Per @TruHart1 he recently published a memoir. https://www.companyofmen.org/threads/a-self-published-book-by-escort-armann-behind-the-mask.138280/

He used to live in Chicago and travel quite a lot. Also went by “collegestudguy.” There are several threads using that moniker, for example: https://www.companyofmen.org/threads/info-on-dylan-collegestudguy.104276/#post-959502

This is not the first time this issue has come up. I am reminded particularly of a thread by Devon Hunter from a few years ago: https://www.companyofmen.org/threads/a-way-to-warn-other-escorts-of-a-repeat-time-waster.102347/. I align myself with the comment of @WhamIAm (post 33), although I do not find it completely satisfying, as I also sympathize with Devon’s response about a “cycle of powerlessness.” (post 34). Demanding that providers simply absorb the loss and move on with no realistic accountability for appalling client misbehavior leaves me with a bad taste in my mouth. Still, I cannot think of an alternative approach that does not risk creating even greater damage, for all sides. As I have said before, if there were a code of professional ethics in this business, I think the first rule would absolute discretion for the client (with the only exception being cases of violence). https://www.companyofmen.org/threads/price-point-and-alternative-advetising-lowering-rates.120359/page-2#post-1206041 (post 28). I even extended this to the Italian priest case not long ago, even though I think my view was in the minority on that thread. https://www.companyofmen.org/threads/italian-escort-tells-all.134378/. People have also clearly not forgotten about the Austin Wolf controversy, so once the line has been crossed, it can have a lasting impact. https://www.companyofmen.org/threads/out-of-bounds-by-an-escort.106907/, https://www.companyofmen.org/threads/public-shaming-of-the-john-part-deux-austin-wolf.100252/. Along those lines, there was also this: https://www.companyofmen.org/threads/scammer-alert-beware.104455/ (which I cross-reference because of some insightful comments, not because I’m trying to resurrect old disputes on threads that had to be shut down). Having said all that, we all make mistakes, and we would all be hurting if there were no second chances. While some people may cross someone off their list for such transgressions, others would simply proceed more cautiously. Last year, I chose to meet up with someone I was quite enamored with, despite knowing that he had used his twitter account to publicly shame someone who had offended him somehow. We had a great time together, and I am glad I overlooked his faux pas.

I don't know any such thing. Perhaps you should speak for yourself instead of presuming to speak for others?

The example I was thinking of was not a typical sting operation, but was more of an undercover operation which culminated in shutting-down an escort review site and the arrest and prosecution of dozens of people, including the website operator (who later killed himself). Two of the prosecutions are apparently still ongoing, more than two years later. https://sexworkclients.org/news-updates/give-to-the-review-board-defense/ Anyway, I went back and read the article again, and you’re right that it was not the police that originally requested the photo ID’s; nevertheless, through their investigation they ended up with “hundreds of pieces of identification” of clients including “employee badges from Microsoft, Amazon and Boeing, as well as LinkedIn accounts, business letterheads, passports and even family photos.” According to the article, their reaction was “Wow! They’re sending their personal information to a criminal enterprise.” https://projects.seattletimes.com/2017/eastside-prostitution-bust/ I suspect that reading this kind of a story in the newspaper might make clients more reluctant to provide their full/real names, even for legitimate screening purposes…once the information is out there, who knows where it may end up. While it's not necessarily typical, I think this is an interesting case to be aware of, and I've been trying to follow it since the story first broke in January 2016. https://www.companyofmen.org/threads/crackdown-continues.110695/ While it’s quite lengthy, here is another take on what happened, different from that of the Seattle Times. https://reason.com/archives/2016/09/09/the-truth-about-us-sex-trafficking

From what I have read, this is very common on the straight side of the industry, but very rare on the gay side. This may have to do with the average physical power imbalance between men and women resulting in greater security concerns. Certainly, there are some crazy people out there and knowing someone’s identity could provide a sense of accountability for misbehavior. On the other hand, providing this information comes with its own set of risks. During coverage of a major local “sting” operation, I recall the authorities expressing shock that people would freely give out their drivers’ license, employee ID badge, etc. Of course, after such an operation, people are far less likely to be so forthcoming in the future. In this way, the government authorities inadvertently discourage a safety/screening method and make life more dangerous for those they are supposedly trying to protect.

I wonder if these services get counted in the “basket of goods” used to calculate inflation? Apparently, they determine this from consumer survey data on expenditures, so I hope people are accurately reporting all this, so we can get some accurate statistics instead of just anecdotes. https://www.bls.gov/cpi/questions-and-answers.htm#Question_2

In the past, I have often insisted on using condoms for oral sex to reduce the risk of contracting an STI. Sometimes I forgo this now, accepting some increased risk in exchange for a more enjoyable experience. But I do regularly get screened for gonorrhea and chlamydia with an oral swab without regard to symptoms, as these STIs can be asymptomatic. In terms of reducing the risks associated with oral sex, people should also consider getting vaccinated for HPV. There are many strains of this virus, some of which are associated with oropharyngeal cancers. If you are over 26, you generally have to pay for the vaccination series yourself, but it may well be worth it to you. https://www.companyofmen.org/threads/std-how-do-you-protect-yourself.125511/page-2 (post 35), https://www.companyofmen.org/threads/oral-using-a-condom.116256/page-2#post-1130744 (posts 35 and 36). Even though you may have been exposed to one strain, the vaccine may protect you against another.

Thank you for the birthday wishes! I am genuinely touched, and I don’t mean that in a pun kind-of-way. And while I’ve been busy recently and not posting as much as I used to, I intend to stick with you guys for the long term and keep contributing when I can.

While I don't claim to have any particular expertise, my impression has always been that the actual words passed into law by Congress matter much more than what individual members of Congress say they are intending to do by passing said law. So I don’t think the fact that Senators highlight sex trafficking victims during the floor debate and don’t say much about gay people means very much. The words in the law clearly apply to everyone, including gay people, and they also clearly apply to non-sex-trafficking situations, and that’s what matters. I suppose Schumer’s comments might come into play if someone were to advance a very broad theory of what “promote” means, such as trying to argue that nonprofits that have webpages and provide STD testing are indirectly “promoting” prostitution. The word "promote" might be considered ambiguous, and Schumer's statement might help in interpreting the meaning of the term in that kind of situation. But I don’t see anything here that would make RM any less liable than it otherwise might be.

I’m sorry to see you leaving and wish you the best in the move and with your new treatment. Incidentally, I was just checking out the ads in Dallas and saw lots of folks visiting there from here (plus I believe that AndrewK is also in the midst of moving there), so if you get a hankering for a “taste” of the PNW, you’ll have lots of options

I should have mentioned that it is a controversial theory. Obviously, Nurse Meissner from Quora.com is a skeptic, but beyond that I am aware that many people are critical of the idea for one reason or another. Personally, I am not aware of any real research supporting it or refuting it. All I can say is that I have some limited, purely anecdotal, reason to believe there may be something to it, at least in some cases. And I mentioned it in this thread because in the case I recently learned of, the two things (masturbating exclusively in the prone position and an inability to achieve organism in the presence of another) appeared to be related to each other, or, at least, the treatment for one correlated with a breakthrough in the other, after more than a decade of frustration.

The mind-body connection when it comes to organism is fascinating but inexplicable to me. I’ve just learned of a condition called Traumatic Masturbation Syndrome, or TMS, which comes from masturbating in the prone, facing down position, to the point that this is the only way orgasm is achievable. You could say that this condition, which I’d never heard of until a week ago, is actually how (in a very indirect way) I ended up on this forum. Apparently, an inability to reach orgasm in the presence of another is also commonly associated with this condition, which has both physical and psychological components. http://www.healthystrokes.com/

There are so many rackets when it comes to professional sports, it’s hard to know where to begin. But on the subject of ticket sales generally, I found this story about the resale ticket market during the 2015 Super bowl to be facinating, particularly because I remember a lot of fanatical Seahawks fans around here going nuts about it. It’s well worth a listen: https://www.npr.org/sections/money/2018/02/02/582861315/episode-822-the-shortest-super-bowl

I’ve been on a couple of cruises, though it’s been awhile and maybe things have improved. But my experience in both cases was that phone and Internet service while as sea were completely impractical/expensive/impossible. On a gay cruise, I saw people put up magnetic white boards on their doors (which are metal) and resort to writing messages to communicate with each other (like “Hey Jeff, sorry I missed you…let’s meet in the bar lounge on deck 3 at 8,” and so on). It was like going back to the dark ages (i.e., the Regan/Bush era) before cell phones. Still, it’s kindof nice to walk around and not be surrounded by zombies staring at phones all the time.

I don’t have any new information but can reinforce your observations. I am also suspicious, though that could just be become I am a suspicious person generally.

I was just reading an interesting article about all this the other day. It’s a bit long, but well worth the read. https://www.medscape.com/viewarticle/892210?nlid=120671_3521&src=WNL_mdplsfeat_180213_mscpedit_radi&uac=73321SK&spon=35&impID=1558470&faf=1#vp_1 One line stands out to me: “The British public can't have it both ways. They can't simultaneously enjoy the thrift of a healthcare system with a tab of only 9% of the GDP, yet demand a structure needed to catch outliers. Such a structure costs…. If the British public insists on thrift, they must also accept the errors that come with thrift.” The same thing applies to queues, fixed appointment times, the recent strikes by junior doctors, etc. It’s the same old story, and one that applies to the US healthcare system as well: people want more than they’re willing to pay for, but in the end, something has to give. My impression is that the NHS these day is, as @escortrod said, “a system already stretched to breaking point.”

I prefer the terms “sex work” and “sex worker” to “prostitution” and “prostitute” because I think the latter tend to be used more pejoratively and have a generally negative connotation in our culture. In contrast, recognizing that individuals who provide this service are engaged in “work” just like other professional service providers, attempts to reduce the unfortunate stigma that is often associated with those who trade sex for money. The term “escort,” in contrast, refers to someone who provides companionship (not sex) for a fee. This distinction is legally important because sex work is currently a crime in most jurisdictions, whereas simply spending time with someone is not. Of course, some people argue that if sex “just happens” to occur during that time, after which a “donation” is freely offered, that this technically does not transform the situation from “escorting” to “prostitution.” Personally, I am skeptical about this view, but I believe it is widely held. I could speculate that if this is the situation you’re describing, that your companion’s aversion to the term “sex worker” could stem from a desire to maintain a sense of ambiguity about what is actually going on. Of course, I have no idea what may have transpired, so this is all speculation. Anyway, here are some other posts about the difference between escorting and sex work: https://www.companyofmen.org/threads/alex-dreamlover-im-not-a-prostitute-im-an-escort.130455/page-2#post-1399800 (post 26) https://www.companyofmen.org/threads/sentencing-of-jeffrey-hurant-rentboy-com-on-friday.126472/page-2#post-1325257 (post 27)

Thanks for the recommendations. They led me to another thread I’d missed since “PS” instead of “Palm Springs” was in the title. I’m cross-referencing it here in case others are looking, plus it’s got some info on Deron (https://www.masseurfinder.com/members/deron_760.shtml), Danny (https://www.massagem4m.com/masseur/15844/), and others. https://www.companyofmen.org/threads/ps-recommendations.116100/#post-1127527

I’ve noticed there are quite a few threads here about the Palm Springs area, but there are a number of interesting masseurs that I can’t find much info about. Does anyone know anything about the following masseurs? Justin—https://www.masseurfinder.com/members/psmasseur.shtml JD—https://www.masseurfinder.com/members/germantouch26.shtml Rene— https://www.masseurfinder.com/members/renestouch.shtml Palmer— https://www.masseurfinder.com/members/palmersmassage.shtml Arturo— https://www.massagem4m.com/masseur/17195/ Andrew— https://www.massagem4m.com/masseur/18464/ Steve— https://www.masseurfinder.com/members/gaymassage.shtml I appreciate any insights people might have on these masseurs or anyone else they would recommend in Palm Springs. I think the ideal masseur is probably someone with some training, who can perform both the more medically therapeutic as well as more sensual aspects of massage. Of course, it doesn’t hurt if he’s also fit/muscular and cute

You’re probably right, but there are also potential clients who never become customers because of legal concerns, so the market could potentially expand on the other side of the equation as well.